Of swollen eyes and shrinking hearts.

Today I spent my time with Joey, Jean and T.Didi. Lol.
It was fun! I laughed so much that I think my stomach shrank! Awesome~
Heard a lot of issues, I hope it this will enlighten the seniors and make them solve the problem instead of just listening and not taking action.
Really glad that some of them are serious about this!

Next...

I don't know to laugh or to cry. I'm happy yet hurt by the action.
Just makes me wonder, is my existence on earth worth anything at all?
I was bawling my eyes out in the shower just now, I kept questioning myself.
Why are my opportunites always taken away? Why do people take me for granted?
Is my existence on earth making an impact on people at all?
I just feel so invisible.
I can only talk to myself here, since no one reads! LOL.
I am a nobody...
In fact, I don't feel like existing here anymore.

Everyday my heart grows smaller and smaller,
everyday someone breaks my trust and moves on with their lives,
leaving me stuck behind.
Everyday, i only tell myself to love myself.
I am fucking sick of getting hurt.
Why is God doing this to me????????????

I can only remain true, trusting everyone all the time.
Too easily.
I am always like that.

And... what do I get?

HURT.

(i am not talking about my boyfriend.)
(just to clarify.)
sighs.

Thanks JJ for your words and somehow you're always around to listen to me rant, Joey for your Beard Papa & NicoleClaire for the MAC Eyeliner and Star studds from BKK! :)

Rahhhhhhhhhhh.

I hate it when people run away from me.
Makes me wanna do the same to them too.
Especially so when they hide and know that you're still here.
They just wanna get away from you without facing it.
I'm so freaking tired of this.
So next time when I run and hide from you, you can't blame me.
Cos' you're doing the same to me too.


When you tell me you're happier spending time with other people, it makes me not want to carry on anymore.