dance

somehow dance made my day today.
pictured speakerphone's steps in my head.
somehow my visualizations managed to become reality.
thanks to those who said it was nice.
it's been awhile since i felt like this.
what a way to end 2008,
and head 2009 with full force.
i'm not gonna give myself up this time around.

bad night :(

boyfriend made me rather pissed last night,
cos we were commenting on some of my old videos.
which were like shit.
and the very-tired-to-the-point-of-becoming-petty me,
got friggin pissed.
that i decided to sleep on it.
BAD BAD BAD IDEA.

i woke up at an unearthly hour of 6.35am!!!
FCUK.
i have not woke up this early in years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
peed, drank some sleep inducing solution(CHOCOLATE MILK)
and i headed to bed.
the entire night i was feeling damn uncomfortable and irritable.
my body was burning,
my quilt seemed to thick for the weather,
the entire bed felt like it was on fire.
i reckon it was just my temperature.
bad dreams the entire night,
i dreamt i fought with chin on a tour bus,
then i have to jump over this drain thingy to get my earring,
cos i threw it in a fit of anger.
okay,
this is just a snippet,
i cannot remember the rest.
anyhoo,
NEVER,
yes,
NEVER SLEEP ANGRY.
e'nuff' said.

woke up this morning and i saw his text:

"Hey baby. Sorry tt i blabbered crap last night. I wasn't feeling good."

he was sick luhhh.
flu bug.
at least he texted.

i replied

"Okay. I forgive you. If you treat me well today. Lol. :)"

hahahahha.
yes i know, i am a bitch.

okay the bitch is signing off~

kevin's skullcandy and i :)

happy 2nd and not so very happy other things

happy 2nd baby,
it feels like forever since we were together.
i am sure there's more to come for us,
but we'll stick by each other,
learning along the way,
no matter what.

this song expresses how i feel for you.
gwen stefani - the real thing

I've seen your face a thousand times
Have all your stories memorized
I've kissed your lips a million ways
But I still love to have you around

I've held you too many times to count
I think I know you inside out
And we're together most days
But I still love to have you around

You're the one I want and it's not just phase
You're the one I trust, our love is the real thing


actually i was contemplating whether to declare my feelings for you to the whole world in this post.
because, my lazy boyfriend rarely talks about me. :(
oh well, his laziness wins me :((
double the sadness.
hahahahhaa.
anyhoo,
a little something for our 2nd :)




haven't been sleeping or eating properly for the past few days.
my eyelids are super heavy right now,
at the brink of closing anytime soon.
argh,
my messed up body clock.
think i'm falling ill soon,
that's if i don't look after myself properly.
my skin's really bad.
i feel like i am too ugly to head out now.
just wanna hibernate at home,
and finish all my IJs!!!!!!!!!!!

i think i said this countless times,
people should watch their tone when they speak to others.
i am starting to hate text messages,
they give a rather cold impression to the receiver,
without the 'haha'(s) and 'lol'(s).
you might think i ain't referring to you,
but you know what you did.
i was just asking the details of our plans,
but no one confirmed anything.
it just makes it sound like it's my fault.
then, i would rather not go,
to something so last minute.

there's an ongoing cold war at home ever since that incident,
it's so fucking irritating,
i am sick and tired of dealing with it.
but i have to.
cos it's something dear and important to me.
this grudge that she has towards my dad is like living in her mind, body and soul.
give the oldman a break.
i am sure he's tired and just wants to enjoy his old age.
however, beacuse of US.
yes US, the children and additional kids in the family,
he has to work like a mad cow,
even though there's nothing to do in his company.
anyway, what happened in the past,
has happened,
don't fucking rake it up.
everyone makes mistakes.
just forgive and forget.
if you really open your mind to the God you believe in,
you will be able to forgive easily.

okay i have a short term project right now,
another long term one which i have yet to start.
i'm praying for more open doors,
in my career, dance and relationships.
please God,
i really need help right now.

Happy 18th JOEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *EDITED*

hello world.
i'm kinda sad that today's the last day of my holidays.
and the worst thing is that,
i have yet to do my assignments!!!!
procrastination got the better of me.

anyway,
szehui introduced me this program called
www.scrapblog.com
to do my A&P IJ,
but in the end, i did it on powerpoint instead.
Spent the rest of the day playing with this tool though :)

supposed to head to Kenny's for Thanksgiving,
but i have too much work and i need time alone.
heh.
watching the New Police Story right now,
the subs sound funny.
lol.
too fake.

lol.
enjoy the post!





tomorrow's our 61 days together.
it feels like a year :)

HOHOHO!

hello earthlings!
once again the end of the year is here!
this Christmas was pretty darn awesome,
except for the eve,
cos the Grinch stole Christmas.
anyhoo~~~~~
I have alot to thank!

thanks to all the messages sent from my pretty friends!
a record of 18 messages were received!
thanks guys,
have a great holiday too!

special thanks to:
ahlee for the monokuro boo notebook!
nicole for the la vie en rose musical box!
joyce for the candies!
joey for the earrings,mentos and stars!
iris and beibei for the bookmark!
kat for the lovely, more pigment eyeshaow!
badd for the pencil!
nelson for the Mars bar!
royston for the bath towel! (won during gift exchange at joey's)
gen for the ferrero roche! (gift exchange during connect group steamboat!)

i had alot of fun this Christmas,
thanks guys for everything!
it's really the company that makes the difference!
hehe :D

of cos,
i have to thank my super duper boyfriend!
for that wonderful Christmas lunch at his place!
he cooked me seafood agolio olio :)
yum yum~
it's pretty good!
i like the spiciness and the scallops and prawns!!!
thank you baby,
i never knew you could cook!

got to know his mum and sister,
which is kinda scary.
but yeah, gotta face it someday!
wee~
i'm a happy girl!
can't wait for the new year countdown!

Christmas Lunch

spaghetti monsieur?

je'taime <3

i finished the food, the fruits were cut by his mom :)

chef in action!

DISTURB! DISTURB!

man enough for me :))))))))

ooh~

not cooked yet!

after several QC tests!

yummy yummy yummy, i've got love in my tummy!

Christmas Party @ Joey's place

raazmy and the kukufied pangyang with my ladybug peg on his shirt!

tell me who doesn't love a game of charades in TPDE?

laughing our asses of as usual!

baby stepping up the game :)

beautiful nicole and her loudhaler voice. LOL.

everyone having fun :)))))))))))))))))))

hello,i'm your fellow camera bitch.

raazmy looks really pretty here.

concentrate, concentrate, concentrate, concentrate~

nelson: that's right!

nice socks buddy! guess who?!

gift exchange time!

roy: yay! it's mine! *beams*

happily receiving our presents :D

roy: eh how come there's two no. 11?!?!
LOL.

now roy looks funny. LOL.

drunken stupor

my biggest and bestest gift this Christmas :D

my presents :D

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RYAN AKA OLDMAN!!
Best wishes and God bless!

'you're beautiful' still rings in my ears :)

This the season to be fatty~ Shalalalalalalalala

Christmas,
the season of giving.
I have given alot this year,
but Christmas makes me feel like giving more.
Feel quite sad that this Christmas I didn't get to do anything meaningful,
maybe next year,
I wanna help out at the hospital or orphanage or something.
Must plan ahead this time!

On the eve,
boyfriend and i headed to Church,
but we were turned away cos the halls were full.
that's damn sad,
cos i wanted to enjoy it with him.
we met Kevin, who was stuck outside too,
so 3 of us headed to the airport to have Popeyes!

Kevin left for Marina Barrage with Aaron and gang later,
so boyfriend and i hung out a bit at the airport.

This little funny conversation erupted between us.

Me: Hey we must kiss under the mistletoe cos it's Christmas!
Kaiwen: What Mee Soto(mistletoe)?!?!

and i burst out laughing after that.
heh.
he's adorable :)
gave him a MJ record,
hope you liked it, cos i do!
and a handmade card which is darn funny.

okay i'm gonna get my gift from him soon,
and and and,
head to joey's for he party later!
MERRY CHRISTMAS Y'ALL!!!!!!!!!!

fuck you.
thank you for ruining Christmas.

so kiss me

hello world,
i'm back from dance camp,
and i must say its a blast to my muscles.
LOL.
okay, i had fun too,
especially the amazing race part! :)
will update on KL trip and dance camp in the near future.
(sounds so not promising. heh)

anyway i got tagged to do this by nicole "curry-puff" claire,
and i shall do it here instead of facebook,
cos i have no idea how to.
okay i'm a dumb bitch.
but whatever,
at least i don't steal boyfriends!

Directions: Once you’ve been tagged, you have to write a note with 16 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 16 people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them.

1) I'm writing this to kill time.
2) I love anything relating to Japan and STRAWBERRIES. (just that strawberry shortcake, the cartoon thingy, doesn't count.)
3) My life ambition is to be a great dancer that earns tonnes, opens a retail store and also a great daughter and mother.
4) I HAVE TO egest every morning, or at least i try to.
5) I have a fetish for vampires. (no, it's not a twilight kinda thing, more of i like how vampires fondle with each other's neck.)
6) I fart alot at home.
7) I LOVE LOVE LOVE reminiscing the past.
8) I have a genetic spine disorder, known as scoliosis. It's a bitch and it's gonna stay with me for life.
9) I LOVE TPDE.
10) I sprained both my ankles before, the left from ballet and the right from netball.
11) My boyfriend's the only one who knows most of my secrets that occurred throughout my life.
12) AND he thinks my dad look's like an Asian Pierce Brosnan.
13) I used to rear goldfishes when I was little and I ever thought of how to cook it if we lack of fishes to eat at home. (The family's a seafood fanatic.)
14) I used to have a Chinese-German bestfriend in primary school, current bestie is a malaysian!
15) I listen to electronica. It can make me high and orgasm sometimes. LOL.
16) I am learning how to love someone.

- Kaiwen: cos you're my american boy and i love you.
- Jasmine Yap: hello bestie!
- Kat(maotherine): Hey baby, I miss your moanings.
- Joey: i'm popping right now.
- Suzanne: HELLO FROM SINGAPORE TO HONGKONG!
- Joycelyn: i think you're sexy enough to do this.
- Meichin: you're chin's too bee-you-tee-full.
- Zhenhui: ARE WR GONNA MEET UP THIS XMAS OR WHAT?!
- Marcus: Cos he secretly reads everyone's blog.
- Royston Teoh: your nostrils will become smaller if you do this.
- GOD: WHY DO I HAVE TO TAG SO MANY PEOPLE and thank you for everything.
- Alson: cos i'm being random.
- Badd: my fellow freakomaniac and butt fan.
- Nic(the fisherman): i wonder what you'll write.
- Santa Claus: I wanna have a great Christmas this year.
- Serene: Cos i doubt she'll do this lame thing. LOL.






do you wanna be part of my life?
these words that has been choking in me for as long as i can remember.
some things you just have to say it to let others understand,
how you really feel for them.

sometimes i run,
sometimes i hide,
sometimes i'm scared of you,
but all i really want is to hold you tight,
treat you right,
be with you day and night,
baby all i need is time.

dance is bad,
memory is bad,
i hope my long awaited Christmas will be good.
i always love Christmas,
i'll start dreaming of snow, turkey, family gatherings, friends, love and finally this year,
my one and only :).

nothing seems right anymore

if i could write a story,
a story about me.
all i can write in it will be filled with you.
how sorry i am,
how hurt we are,
how regretful i have been,
how in love i am,
with you.

if i could compose a tune,
it'll be to our favourite song,
about a boy who meets a girl,
and they fall in love,
happily ever after.

if i was a mime,
the tears on my cheek spells bittersweet.
i would show the world how lonely i am,
if it weren't for you.
the black and white shows the dullness,
and the sad red lips,
show what you have left on me,
a love full of you.

if i was a disease,
you would be my antidote.
my cure for all sickness,
my happy pill forever.

if i could turn back time,
i'll hold onto your hand without fail,
my pinky will grip on to yours,
despite the distance.
i would tell you 'i love you.',
with all my heart and soul.

these bad thoughts in my head,
keep drowning me every single day.
evil and vivid,
they keep beating me to you.
all i can say is,
i love you,
i love you,
i love you,
inside this lonely space,
inside this empty heart,
i'll always do,
have a piece of you.

feeling better

okay yongpeng's food seriously got me bad.
i bombed the entire KL in my loo today.

talking with the girls(kat, joyce, serene, joey, chin and iris joined later),
made me a tad bit happier.
especially the cybersex.
ooh yeah baby~
hahahaa.
funny how our conversations always lead to food.
yum yum.
eating honey stars now.


i wish i was slimmer.
i wish i was prettier.
i wish i could dance better.
i wish i was more lovable.
but i'm not.
would you still love me like that?

i'm home :)

feels good to be home.
KL was fun, cheap, itchy, smelly and dirty.
but i still enjoyed my time there. :)
was it because you were there always?
holding my hand?
i don't know why i came back eeling so numb.
like i have lost all my friends.
friend sickness?
hur hur hur.
thank God beibei called just now.
i missed you tonnes!!!!!!!!!
i feel like i became stagnant in dance.
i feel really lousy right now,
and i just wanna die in my shithole and eat from a small opening.
but what's the point when my internet is so darn slow, keeps d/cing and is pissing the hell outta me.
i think i'll just scoot from this place.
bye.

KL Dreaming~

hello world.

i'm kinda bored cos i got home kinda early.

and i'm like kinda packing my luggage for KL tomorrow!

wee~~~~~~~~~~~

holidays are love :)))))))))))))

i'm super broke after this though.

ugh.

i hate to think about monetary issues.

to all that's heading to HK,

have fun and buy me some goodies!!!!!!!!!!

and to all who's stuck in SG,

MISS ME!!!!!!!!!!

love you all,

see you guys in 4 days!

smelling freedom(KL) at a door's length

wee~
a few more hours to the last paper!
study study study..
then poof all gone is a week.
can't wait for KL trip.
i'm booking TMR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i hope i can see my boyfriend then.
and catch a movie with ah mao~

by the way i feel sexually harrassed by my lil cousin!!
she has been groping my ass like there's no tomorrow.
i don't know for whst reasons,
but she's oh so adorable.
okay give her permission to grope.
LOL.

family :)))))))))))

lovesssssssssssssssss!

our neatest move??? LOL.

OR-HOR joey do wrong step; choreographed mistake!
LOL.

all doing different things. heh.

samansarii in action.

uh-huh that's right, cover your mistakes with a smile :)

seducing some fellow jungleman(woman)

the i'm-so-happy-it's-coming-to-an-end-pose

nights all!

Dancepointe Bi-Annual Recital

had performance at victoria theatre just now.
for dancepointe.
i would never do it again.
seriously.
alot of waiting and time wasted doing nothing,
when i can be at home studying.
and now,
i have yet to do my revision on A&P,
and i feel like sleeping......

made a lot of new friends though.
two whom i can talk on the same level with,
the rest are...
yeah.
had alot of fun with bboy alex(medium) and hanafi today!
we went to walk while waiting, shop, eat, smoke session(hanafi only, we are good kids), playing with the kids etc.
see pictures for more details!

my two new friends!
hanafi and bboy alex(medium)

In the holding area:

a lot of ballerinas

cuter ones

hiphop students.

While waiting we...

explored the star changing room.

hanafi found the Puss In Boots sword!

and we realised it's super budget!
alex was saying we can make mango pudding out of the cup. LOL.

We also...

slept :)))))))))))))

with our Santarina hats on! :D

And we made...

NEW-VERY-ADORABLE-4-YEAR-OLD-FRIENDS!!!!!!

i became a mum after that.

they were asking me to take photos of them!!

For those who have not seen me for long:

this is my daughter.

her name is ng yu yan.
(OH NO WHY NOT ZHENG!, p.s boyfriend don't kill me. LOL)

she is my favourite sotong(i mean shark.)! :)

my daughter and her friends.
they were telling me how to wear my shirt and not show my bra.
if not shame shame!
LOL.

innocence :)

hanafi stole her away a after that!

with his subcrew cap!

i got so depressed, i went on to becoming a shark. LOL.

till my second daughter came. :))))))))

i seemed to be losing confidence.
i feel greedy,
the need to get attention from friends.
i feel pretty lost from them,
it's like the term test has been swallowing me up.
i just can't wait for it to get over.
and i think it's time to buck up in dance.
yes,
i'm determined.
i'm so excited about the KL trip!
time to booooooooook.

and i saw a rat today...
and i yelped yet again!!!!!!!!
ARGH.
darn rats.