Heya again! Well, no post today, just a lil' somethin I would like to share with u guys. It's a poem, a really meaningful one to those who are secretly admiring someone else from afar.

Just Friends by Stacey Kelly

I act like all I feel for you is friendship,
yet there's so much more.
In fear of losing you I leave my emotions locked behind
an unstable door.

I can feel it pull,
I can feel it pry...
Because all my heart want is to say
is what it's feeling deep down inside.

The mask of emotions I wear is running kinda thin,
when will our friendship end and relationship begin?

Rejection is what I fear,
"I'm sorry I just like you as a friend"is what I know I shall hear.
And that kind of sorrow I cannot bear.
So for now my true feelings you will not hear.


*Break the Rules. Find Your Freedom. Live Your Life

blastin' Black Eyed Peas - Dirty Dancing

Muevele, muevele
Bailar, yo quiero baila lalalalalalala bailar,
Mueve las nalgas, shake your ass girl.
A la musica, we'll be dancing, dancing, dancing a bit Havana.
And we gon shake it, shake it, shake it, don shake it.

Hips start shakin' and movin' all around

Get them hips shakin' around.

I like to dirty dance, I like to do my thang,
So mami get a little loose and make your hips swing.
Its like were making
Love when I am dancing with you,
Its like you climax mami when I dip you (AH)
So lets just dirty dance, yeah lets salsa,
Lets do that on the floor and make it hot now (HA)
And mami move your culo to the Conga,
Sweat dripping down your body is how i want ya.
And muy caliente is how you makin' me (HA),
To paradise mami is where you taking me.
And all we really doing is moving our feet,
Dancing really close and creating some body heat.
But I remain elegant, you say elegante,
That is so irrelevant so lets keep on dancing, cause look
I speak english and you speak spanish,
And music is the only thing that we be understanding.

I just wanna be dancing.....dirty, dirty,dirty dancing.
Bailar, yo quiero baila lalalalalalala bailar,
Mueve las nalgas, shake your ass girl.
A la musica, we'll be dancing, dancing, dancing a bit Havana.
And we gon shake it, shake it, shake it, don shake it.

Hips start shakin' and movin' all around

Get the hips shakin' around.

Lets dirty dance right here on the floor girl,
Lets do our thang, lets give them a show girl
(But I don't know, don't think their ready for this, Lets give it to them, i hope their ready for this).
You put your hands on my hips, I put my hand on your hip,
Baby I'll follow your lead, check it goes like this.

[Fast beat]
Baby just follow the motion,
Dancing a sexual motion,
Moving with so much emotion.
We gettin' dirty now.

[man]
Its how we dance
[woman]
Its how we dance
[man]
Its how we dance
[woman]
Its how we dance
[man]
Its how we dance
[woman]
Its how we dance

Me and my girl dance with so much passion,
It looks like we having sex but we just dancing,
Dirty sex dancing with our clothes on,
If you are offended blood we mean no harm.

That's how we dance X4

Yea yea just dirty dancing, lets go just dirty dancing,
Its sexual just dancing (yeah), its dirty dirty dirty dancing.

Bailar, yo quiero baila lalalalalalala bailar,
Mueve las nalgas, shake your ass girl.
A la musica, we'll be dancing, dancing, dancing a bit Havana.
Shake it, shake it, shake it, don shake it

Oh...Movin' all around. Oh...Movin' all around.

Hips start shakin' and movin' all around
Get the hips shakin' around.

Bailar, yo quiero baila lalalalalalala bailar,
Mueve las nalgas, shake your ass girl.
A la musica, we'll be dancing, dancing, dancing a bit Havana.
Shake it, shake it, shake it, don shake it.
I just wanna be dancing.....dirty, dirty,dirty dancing.

hey guys, i'm finally back on blogger again! wee! good news eh? haha. anyway the school vacation are gonna end soon and here i am writing an entry. well, this vacation was quite laid back and interesting in some way or another. u guys wouldn't believed it, but i actually did exercise okay!! i hardly go online( good sign! ) and i read loads!!! *woot* sammie girls, ya rock! c'mon, i need some self praise for myself. anyway, i rented a couple of vcds the other day and boy, i loved them! 50 First Dates was like rockin! I cried when Drew Barrymore broke up with Adam Sandler.. I mean, he's sucha sweetie, doing stuff for her and all that, and to let him live his dreams, she had to break up with him.. Aww... Sweet romantic comedy. it was rockin hilarious at some parts. =) Then i watched Lord of the Onion Rings heex, kidding. I watched Lord of the Rings - minus the Onion it was awesome! The fighting scenes were fatastico! Wow i spoke spanish or latin or french or dutch. Wateva. Haha. By the way, i watched the trilogy, the whole series was great. The plot was amazing, so were the cast. I am still brooding over Legolas and Aragon. Haha. I just love it! Even my dad couldn't keep his eyes off it! Well, the best of the best was still Havana Nights : Dirty Dancing 2. I can't help it, i love to dance. This show is great, although the plot is predictable and all that. You shoulda've seen the dance routine! Man, it was amazing. It's not that the steps are dramatic or watsoeva. But, it was more of the passion and love going about the couple. You can see that they really wanna be with each other from their eyes and body language. I wish i could find a boyfriend like Javier Suarez ( Diego Luna played him ). Ya know, just dance the night away~ Lolx. I dream too much. Anyway, ya guys should catch that show with your special someone ya know.. Heex~ Well, it's preettty late and i guess i should be going, nite eveeryone! Esp. ME!!!!!!!!!! Mwah! Lotsa love!!

blastin' Mya - Do You Only Wanna Dance?

Funny thing is when I look into your eyes
I sense something so sincere in your disguise
You whisper secrets I hear only in my dreams
Then I wake up to your tele-smoke screen
I wait patiently while you play your game
'Cause in the end, I'll be the winner all the same
You'll see clearly when the song comes to a stop
I'll be the one blowing kisses from the top
(So baby, stop) Stop, you're surrounded
(I got my love) Love all around ya
(One wrong move) Move and I'll down ya
And that'll end ya
You should surrender
You'll never win
Unless you give in

(So stop, baby, stop) Stop, you're surrounded
(I got my love) Love all around ya
(One wrong move) Move and I'll down ya
And that'll end ya
You should surrender
You'll never win
Unless you give in
So won't you give our love a chance?
Or do you only wanna dance?

You put your lips very closely to my face
And then you run away and so begins the chase
I'll be the hunter, but boy, you better pray
'Cause when I want ya, I'll get you anyway
You know what I wanna do
It ain't nothing new
I'm tired of dropping clues
So, gonna step to you
Will you rise to my occasion?
Or will you make me change your station?

Stop, you're surrounded
(I got my love) Love all around ya (Uh)
(One wrong move) Move and I'll down ya
And that'll end ya
You should surrender
You'll never win
Unless you give in

(Stop) Stop, you're surrounded
(Oh, I got my love) Love all around ya
(One wrong move) Move and I'll down ya
And that'll end ya (Uh)
You should surrender (Uh)
You'll never win
Unless you give in
So won't you give our love a chance?
Or do you only wanna dance?

If you take my hands
And follow my lead
I'll make you dance (I can make you dance)
But if you get my feet (Get my feet)
And miss the beat (And miss the beat)
Then I can't take that chance (Then I can't take that chance)
If you take my hands (Oh)
And follow my lead (Oh, Oh, oh-oh)
I'll make you dance (I can make you dance)
But if you get my feet (Get my feet)
And miss the beat (And miss the beat)
Then I can't take that chance (I can't take it)

(So stop it) Stop, you're surrounded
(I got my love) Love all around ya
(One wrong move) Move and I'll down ya
And that'll end ya
You should surrender
You'll never win
Unless you give in

(So stop) Stop, you're surrounded
(Baby stop)Love all around ya
(One wrong move) Move and I'll down ya
And that'll end ya (Uh)
You should surrender (Uh)
You'll never win
Unless you give in

(Stop, baby, stop) Stop, you're surrounded
(I got my love) Love all around ya
(All around you)Move and I'll down ya
And that'll end ya
You should surrender
You'll never win
Unless you give in

(So stop) Stop, you're surrounded
(I got my love) Love all around ya (All around you)
Move and I'll down ya (Uh-uh-uh)
And that'll end ya (Uh-uh-uh!)
You should surrender (Uh-uh-uh!!)
You'll never win
Unless you give in
So won't you give our love a chance?

hey y0x ppl~ l0ng time since i came here. erm.. the past week was kinda t0ugh & fun all the same. yeah, so0Ooo many tests.. can u imagine? h0w can we cope. i mean, couldn't the teachers like seperate the test days waAaaay away fr0m one another? anyway the exmas are in a weeks time, h0w short can tt be? oh well, i better pull up my socks and start muggin real hard. ugh. it's so irritating when ur like tryin real hard to concentrate but b4 u knw it u hav drifted off to some weirdo land. i can't just stop thinkin about him. mayb i'm a psycho or somethin. so yeah guys, u knw i'm a psycho.. muahahahaha~ i'm comin to get u~ l0lx.. aiight, but i dunno.. am i for real? is he* wat i want? is it just infatuation? i can't judge him for nuts sake cos i'll be like so biased? yeah, wat to do? i'm such a freak. *freakofnature* sometimes i really feel that i l0st something everytime i c0ntinued living in this world. why is that so? i hate someone who despise fat ppl, i hate ppl who scream at me for no reason, i hate ppl who are just downright annoying, i hate cats, i hate rats, i hate flies, i just hate being me.. but i do love myself for some reason or two. i can't possibly hate everythin of me rite? l0lx. i knw i'm retarded. so why bother readin my blog? l0lx. ok i shall cut sh0rt the craps that i was hoping to continue. heex
last sat, i went with zhen,ah ma & lydia to bugis. well, yeah i br0ught $40 for me to spend and as usual i spent m0st of it leavin myself with like $2?? l0lx.i bought this really nice taupe velvet pants so really co0l tops and i bought lydia her bday pressie. that gal, she's so hyper. she kept hinting us on wat to get her for her bday pressie.. bleahx~ we aren't that stupid.. lolx. and yeah, we did some 'feminine' shopping for ah ma as her mum said she has to dress more femininly.. lolx.. i say this really nice skirt at OG i think i might ask my dad to bring me there to buy it =pPp yes i'm a cheapo.. so wat's ur business? l0lx.. aiight i shall end here. goodnitex. love ya all~

hiyA~ i'm back again.. well, haven't been bl0ggin much.. d0n't have the mo0d to d0 so.. l0lxXx.. but oh well i'm here again.. hmm.. l0tsa stuff has been g0in round here.. lydia went to sjc f0r her prefect's attachment thingy, teacher's day celebrati0ns which was a few days ag0.. and yeah.. m0re importantly.. my damn sprained ankle.. h0w the hell did i sprain it? go0d question.. it was on friday, when we had dance rehersal at Palai Studio.. that damn small ro0m.. i w0nder h0w we are g0in to d0 our exam there.. well, matter of factly, i came late c0s nob0dy knws where that damn place is.. alright, i shall st0p cursin it.. l0lxXx.. anyway, i didn't stretched and do my warm up pr0perly, and as i was d0in my d0uble piroquettes, i went over my ankle and twisted it.. the dumbest part was.. i was in a state of sh0cked so i didn't knw where did it hurt.. and ended up icing the wr0ng part.. h0w stupid can i get? so h0px1000 all the way h0me i went.. i had gastrics that nite to0.. terrible pAin n the ass.. wat the hell.. i mean st0mach.. yeah oh teacher's day it was quite fun.. i skipped less0ns, went r0und playin, hahaha.. tellin the Mdm Lee that i had my peri0d and needed to g0 to the washro0m [ ok, lame xcuse, but wth~ ] so yeah, we had fun, d0in wanky stuff.. and damn Somu sucks.. big time she sc0lded me, char & suz c0s we weren't all0wed to g0 near the recepti0n ro0m.. man i think she failed eng to0, she d0esn't knw the meanin of PERSONALLY~ ok wateva, like i give a damn ab0ut her.. anyway it was quite fun.. went back to skps with carla haha.. she lo0ks like a h0t chick nw.. wait, she has always been the chick.. guys were like staring at her.. i dunn0 where.. l0lx.. i was f0rced to g0 to harry's place with her.. but thank g0d that qig0ng sinseh saved me.. i w0uldn't wanna walk int0 their ro0m and catch th0se 2 l0vebirds making out.. l0lxXx.. well there aren s0me other stuff i w0uld wanna say.. but n0t here i guess.. i dun wanna lEt the wh0le world knw.. anyway, i've been thinkin.. d0 i reallyx2 likE -.-? if i d0.. w0uld i ever stand a chAnce? i dun wanna break our friendship ya knw.. but i'm so curi0us... wh0's that girl in his heart? must be s0meone worth fighting f0r.. i dunno.. l0vin him fr0m a distAnce...

blastin' The Rasmus's - First day of my life

Feel like I'm stoned
wanna be alone, just for a while, unknown
Weeks on the road a long way from home
just shut off the phone

And you say I'll heal you,
I'll always be yours
and you say I'll kill you if I do something wrong
yeah, yeah, yeah ,yeah, yeah, yeah

Still feels like the first time
to stand here by your side
together regardless
we'll walk through the darkness
Still fells like the first day of my life

Remember the times
together we swore, never give up this life
still hanging on, still going strong
here I belong

And maybe I'm crazy
but I just can't slow down
And maybe I'm crazy
but at least I'm still around
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Still feels like the first time
to stand here by your side
together regardless
we'll walk through the darkness
Still fells like the first day of my life

Feels like the first day of my life,
(feels like the first day)
Still feels like the first day of my life

Still feels like the first time
to stand here by your side
together regardless
we'll walk through the darkness
Still feels like the first day of my
still feels like the first day of my
still feels like the first day of my life

hiEeE~ hAhax.. life still sucks as usual... bAllet.. studiEss.. wAteva~ yA kn0w? hmMm.. exAm rehersAls are next weEk and i'm still n0t stable yet.. i d0n't keep f0rgettin my stuff if Miss Ong d0esn't screAm at me 24/7.. i'm just tired.. i wish i c0uld like tAke a l0ooOoOoong break f0r just a weEk.. then i'll bE so damn satisfied.. but i guess my wish cann0t be fufilled... l0lx~ oh wEll, wat cAn i d0? l0lx~~ neway, we are playin thi angel*mortal game for netball.. so fun.. hahaha i wanna wh0 is my angel.. but it w0uld'nt be fun anym0re rite? l0lxXx.. kinda fun t0 c everyone so secretive.. hAha.. but this Lilian reveAled t0 Lydia wh0 her angel is lE!!! piAngzz.. LiliAn ahh~ l0lx.. hmMm.. dunn0 wat to do lEh.. these few dAys cann0t wake up early f0r scho0l.. causing my sis t0 get reprimanded by her discipline master.. so s0rry w0rx~ hAhaxx.. i'm kinda confused these few days.. i dunn0 over wat.. but am i n0t really sure if i really like -.- mAh.. cos it's like i reallyx10000000000000000000 dun wAnna l0se our friendship over my so called "infatuati0n" bAhx.. i als0 dun wAn to get jeal0us over smAll lil things ab0ut him l0h.. hAhaxx.. i think it's bEst t0 n0t like anyone.. EXCEPT DREAM OF VIC CHOU & EDISON CHEN bahx.. hAhahAHah.. thEy so dAmn shuAi l0h!!! wAh.. h0pe next time my lAo g0ng will bE like thEm like tt.. hAhahAHahhA~ reAlly l0h! l0lx.. n0w i'm saving m0ney to buy al0t of things siA.. i wAn my Love Storm Vcd, Poor Prince Vcd, Jay's new album, Proactiv Stuff, New Clothes.. and t0 l0se weight? hAhaha~ i'm on a diet.. a stupid diet.. t0 be slim bef0re my ballet exams stArts.. i dunn0 wat risks i am putting myself int0..but anyway.. i wanna be slim.. n0t flabby & disgusting.. hAha.. k lA.. i'll try to update as so0n as i hav free time aiight? lAter~ oh hAppie dAy~~ l0lxXx.. l0ve ya l0ts~ muAcki muAckxXx~~

blastin' Jojo's - Leave ( Get Out )

I've been waiting all day for ya babe
So won't cha come and sit and talk to me
And tell me how we're gonna be together always
Hope you know when it's late at night
I hold on to my pillow tight
And think of how you promised me forever
(I never thought that anyone)
Could make me feel this way
(Now that you're here boy all I want)
Is just a chance to say

Get Out, (leave) right now,
It's the end of you and me
It's too late (now) and I can't wait for you to be gone
'Cause I know about her (who) and I wonder (why) how I bought all the lies
You said that you would treat me right but you was just a waste of time (waste of time)
Tell me why you're looking so confused

When I'm the one who didn't know the truth
How could you ever be so cold
To go behind my back and call my friend
Boy you must have gone and bumped your head
Because you left her number on your phone
(So now after all is said and done)
Maybe I'm the one to blame but
(To think that you could be the one)
Well it didn't work out that way

Get Out, (leave) right now,
It's the end of you and me
It's too late (now) and I can't wait for you to be gone
'Cause I know about her (who) and I wonder (why) how I bought all the lies
You said that you would treat me right but you was just a waste of time (waste of time)
Tell me why you're looking so confused

I wanted you right here with me but I have no choice you've gotta leave
Because my heart is breakin'
With every word I'm sayin'I gave up everything I had
On something that just wouldn't last
But I refuse to cry
No tears will fall from these
Eyeee-eeee-eeees
Ooooh, ooooh
Get out

Get Out, (leave) right now,
It's the end of you and me
It's too late (now) and I can't wait for you to be gone
'Cause I know about her (who) and I wonder (why) how I bought all the lies
You said that you would treat me right but you was just a waste of time (waste of time)
Tell me why you're looking so confused

Get Out, (leave) right now,
It's the end of you and me
It's too late (now) and I can't wait for you to be gone
'Cause I know about her (who) and I wonder (why) how I bought all the lies
You said that you would treat me right but you was just a waste of time (waste of time)
Tell me why you're looking so confused

Get Out, (leave) right now,
It's the end of you and me
It's too late (now) and I can't wait for you to be gone
'Cause I know about her (who) and I wonder (why) how I bought all the lies
You said that you would treat me right but you was just a waste of time (waste of time)
Tell me why you're looking so confused

haixx.. i feel like cryin.. i'm so tired.. jus really wish that time could stop f0r awhile and let me catch s0me rest bef0re chArgin t0wards the future.. t0day straight after scho0l fr0m 5pm to 9pm i hav ballet.. I'm like so dead tired rite n0w? reach h0me ar0und 10++pm c0s my dad has t0 bring my out f0r dinner, g0 back to his fact0ry [ in wo0dlands ] t0 settle s0me stuff.. me?? i really dun care tmr hav wat hmwk le.. i'm g0in to slp. thAt's finAl.. i think neEd t0 hAnd in the writing tAsk lEh.. hAixXx.. i g0 xplAin to mrs sAnkar myself bAhx.. everyday i rush here and there jus t0 fufil others wishes.. i jus wish i c0uld slp.. i wAn my slp!! give me my slp!!! others out there hAvin a greAt time celebratin the nAti0n's bdAy.. i'll be like hAvin bAllet? [ fri - bAllet, sAt - bAllet, m0n - bAllet, tues - bAllet, fri bAllet... & the circle g0es on & on & on ]

in scho0l like so siAn? hAhax.. i dunn0 leh.. i g0t a feelin pf4 w0n't last very l0ng le... jus the 0ther day when chAr asked whether wAnna g0 watch ' The Village ' i was like ' ok ' then i t0ld her to cAll m0re ppl.. i scAred mAh.. hAhahA.. thEn i sAy.. ' cAll zhEn? ' she was like.. ' zhEn g0 i dun wAnna go lE ' hAix.. i dun understAnd chAr.. wat's up with her? whenever we like s0 called nv tell her things.. she'll be like ' y0u all always nv tell me things de.. u kn0w i feel very left out mAh?? ' then n0w she like this.. mAn.. she chAnge damn fast... hAix dunn0 la.. n0wadays in scho0l.. i'm always al0ne? i think tt each & every one of us in L6 will get left out in one way or an0ther.. n0w is my turn bAhx.. zhEn was like " Sam, if u really think u're n0t in L6 le.. mAybe by then it will reAlly hAppen " mayb bAhx.. i mean.. whAt can i sAy? i g0t so much things on my mind le.. bAllet, fAmily pr0bs, scho0lw0rk, netbAll... n0w every time u still wAn me to chAse after them.. lo0k f0r them..? i'm really tired lE l0h.. feel like dr0ppin d0wn dead this instAnce.. tt's y the 0ther dAy we [ zhEn, ahmA, lydiA ] were jus j0kin ar0und when we were g0in to PS they were like.. " u wAn life or deAth? " i sAy i'd rAther die.. mAyb it's a stupid ans. yes i knw. mAyb when i really die, i'll be regrettin thAt m0ment.. c0s i w0uld hav l0st it all... my frens, fAmilies.. everythin.. but tt's my only wish n0w.. so i can be peaceful & hAppy...

hAix.. tmr hAvin netbAll agAin.. i must w0rk d0uble times hArder thAn every0ne.. i feel so bAd f0r missing so mAny less0ns.. ok tmr i'll c0me h0me deAd agAin.. wAteva.. btw, t0day i wasn't mo0dy.. i was just feelin left out. dun keep askin me why i'm mo0dy or h0w's bAllet~! if n0t i'm fArkin g0nna kill u.. whEn i recuperate & hav my strength bAck.. hAhx.. nitE all~

blastin' Ashlee Simpson's - Pieces of me

On a Monday, I am waiting
Tuesday, I am fading
And by Wednesday, I can't sleep
Then the phone rings,I hear you
And the darkness is a clear view
Cuz you've come to rescue me
Fall... With you, I fall so fast
I can hardly catch my breath,
I hope it lasts

Ohhhhh
It seems like I can finally rest my head on something real
I like the way that feels
Ohhhhh
It's as if you've known me better than I ever knew myself
I love how you can tell
All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me
All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me

I am moody, messy
I get restless, and it's senseless
How you never seem to care
Fall... Sometimes I fall so fast
Well, I hit that bottom
Crash, you're all I have

Ohhhhh
It seems like I can finally rest my head on something real
I like the way that feels
Ohhhhh
It's as if you known me better than I ever knew myself
I love how you can tell
All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me

How do you know everything I'm about to say?
Am I that obvious?
And if it's written on my face...
I hope it never goes away... yeah

On a Monday, I am waiting
And by Tuesday, I am fading into your arms...
So I can breathe
Ohhhhh
It seems like I can finally rest my head on something real
I like the way that feels
Ohhhhh
It's as if you've know me better than I ever knew myself
I love how you can tell
Ohhhhh
I love how you can tell
Ohhhhh
I love how you can tell
All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me
All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me...

hiya angels~ hEex dunn0 wat i'm feelin n0w.. hAhx.. yeah t0tally mixed up.. and tt sucks.. hEex.. oh well.. hAha.. yAy!! mr dAwn ne0 finally left us!! hE w0n't be teachin us bAllet anym0re.. mayb f0r repert0ire w0rk next year.. but by thEn.. i w0uld've quit lE.. hAhahA..=) wat can i say? ok.. alth0ugh he sucks s0metimes when he screams his heAd off.. but hE's so cuteEee~ one lEss gAy in my life.. *sighs* erm yeah.. feelin kinda d0wn.. c0s feel so left out? i dunn0 every recess it'll b like ok i'm with L6.. but i'll still b al0ne after tt.. tryin t0 lo0k for them.. yAdax2.. aiyAh.. anyway i very suibian de l0h.. c0s used to it le mah.. i g0t very pissed l0h.. everytime leave me behind then i hav to go lo0k for them? suan le.. n0w got ballet i dun wan to always keep them in mind le l0h.. everytime plan things i also nv go de l0h.. hAix.. wateva~ thx zhen bah.. i t0ld her tt le.. she faster c0me pei wo.. hEex~ shAre wo de l0neliness.. i will l0ve u f0r tt de ger! hAhax i t0ld james tt he was a go0d guy on his bday.. really mah.. he quite understandin bahx.. knw his stead de fren g0t problems very kan de kai.. alth0ugh they supp0sed to spend his bday t0gether... he all0w me to be the go0seberry.. hEhe.. i'm givin u s0me credits here h0r idi0t! l0lxXx.. k lAa... anyway.. dunn0 wat to say.. i'm like n0t so into class w0rk all these lE lo.. n0t really cl0se with them le bahx.. n i really miss nEtball.. fuck bAllet.. it has taken away my lifE!!! oh yeah.. zAizai dAmn shuAi~!~! i think i fell in l0ve with him lE ahh~~~ hahahahah l0lx.. k la dun <> lE l0lx.. but in the real w0rld i still think -.- is bEtter.. hAha.. shHhHhHh... dun say wh0 w0r!!! k la i end off le.. reAlly miss u guys!!

blastin' Katy Rose's - Overdrive

Out of bed at the crack of noon
Blare the music and have a swoon
I can't stop thinking of your face
La la lee la lee loo lace
I'm six feet under the Bhodi tree
With my crap new-age philosophy
Diamonds where there once were stars
I'm sitting in Jayne Mansfield's car

Yeah yeah I'm independence
Yeah yeah I'm borderline
Yeah yeah I'm California
My minds all screwed and upside down
But my hearts on overdrive
Yeah my hearts on overdrive
I need to take a shower when I look at you
You sting and hurt like a bad tattoo
I wish you'd change my point of view
I cruise the canyon to get some breeze
With hidden treasures up my sleeve


I like the light and hate the heat
But I'll lick the blood right off your street
Yeah yeah I'm cherry cola
Yeah yeah I'm Candy-eyed
Yeah yeah I'm California
My minds all screwed and upside down
But my hearts on overdrive

They all come here to find a scene
But end up girls on Methedrine
Naked on a TV screen
The dreams that fall beneath my feet
Make my footsteps feel so sweet
But your kisses are my fate accompli

Yeah yeah I'm independance
Yeah yeah I'm borderline
Yeah yeah I'm California
My minds all screwed and upside down
But my hearts on overdrive
Yeah my hearts on overdrive

y0zziE ppl~ cr4ppy dAy f0r mE... i dunn0 y.. t0day jus kEep.. eAtin, shittin & lAzin ar0und.. wEllx2.. n0w pf4 alL hAv stEads lE.. fEel dAmn wEird with thEm siA.. hAhx.. c4nn0t go out with thEm lE.. if n0t i'lL bE l0nely.. l0lxXx... nvm bAhx.. c0s in my hEart i wilL miss thEm dE!! hEex =)... i dunn0 lEh.. i've mAde up my mind lE.. i m giving up. i dun wAnna wastE my timE with xXx... i givE up on him d0esn't mEan i wilL accept **** la.. so dun w0rry.. i guEss bEing singlE very go0d bAhx.. hAv l0tsa freed0m.. l0tsa frEns to0.. hEex.. mAyb i rEally cann0t win hEr... truE l0h... shE's prEtty, slim & friEndly... i dunn0 wat m i, mAyb s0me retArded idi0t ppl c lE wilL 4gEt th0se kind.. hAhax.. only m0rons will ever think i'm go0d bAhx.. & mAyb my r0ttEn clAn.. hAhx.. i hAte t0day so g0ddam much... i've ruinEd every singlE thing.. my mum's bdAy, my spirits, my lifE.. i fEel so bAd... hAixXx.. whEre's my s0ulmate? thx gErAld f0r tAlkin to me jus n0w... c0uldn't hElp it.. i criEd ag4in... escAped fr0m the cr0wd.. jus lAid whEre xXx and i lAid lAst timE.. th0ught ab0ut thE past.. it's timE t0 cArry oN with lifE... hEez... w0 bu ai tA... zhEn de bu ai tA lE... hAha.. h0pe xXx wilL rEad this.. hAhx.. dA zhu t0u!!!!

blastin' The Cheetah Girl's - Cinderella

When I was just a little girl,
My mama used to tuck me into bed,
And she read me a story.

It always was about a princess in distress
And how a guy would save her
And end up with the glory.

I'd lie in bed
And think about
The person that I wanted to be,

Then one day I realized
The fairy tale life wasn’t for me.

I don’t wanna be like Cinderella,
Sitting in a dark, cold, dusty cellar,
Waiting for somebody to come and set me free. (Come and set me free)
I don’t wanna be like someone waiting
For a handsome prince to come and save me
Oh, no, will survive,
Unless somebody’s on my side.
Don’t wanna be
No, no, no one else.
I’d rather rescue myself.

I can slay (I can slay) my own dragons. (My own dragons)
I can dream my own dreams. (My own dreams)
My knight in shining armor (shining armor) is me.
So I'm gonna set me free.

I don’t wanna be like Cinderella,
Sitting in a dark, cold, dusty cellar,
Waiting for somebody to come and set me free.
I don’t wanna be like someone waiting
For a handsome prince to come and save me
Oh, no, will survive,
Unless somebody’s on my side.

I don’t wanna be like Cinderella,
Sitting in a dark, cold, dusty cellar,
Waiting for somebody to come and set me free.
I don’t wanna be like someone waiting
For a handsome prince to come and save me
Oh, no, will survive,
Unless somebody’s on my side.
Don’t wanna be
No, no, no one else.
I’d rather rescue myself.

niha0 ah~~ fArkin bl0gger i typE so l0ng thEn dElete everythin awAy f0r mE fEel likE killin it l0h.. wAste my preci0use timE u knW an0t!!! fArk la idi0t!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hAhahA.. hmMm... k lA b0 biAn i sAy fr0m thE stArt agAin... l0lxXx..

1st 2 weeks of the scho0l h0ls, i spEnt my timE idling at h0me l0h.. tAlkin to thE f0ur wAlls, wAitin f0r ppl t0 g0 onlinE.. wAtchin mEte0r gArdEn... l0lx.. but i nv jus lAzed ar0und k!!! i wEnt t0 w0rk lEh!!! *quick prAise mE* hEez.. went f0r somE w0rk expErience.. w0rked as a chArity sAles pers0n l0h.. very t0ugh j0b ok... must prEpare f0r l0tsa setbAcks & yAda yAda.. hAha.. hmMm.. must g0 r0und sAyin this lEh:
"hEll0, i'm fr0m FLC, can i hAv a m0ment of ur timE? [ if yEs, c0ntinue rEadin, if n0.. scr0ll d0wn bAh!! l0lxXx ] We are currently d0in a chArity drivE to c0llect funds to aid br0ken fAmilies.. We are seekin out to thE public t0 hElp by d0nating a sum of $10 t0 hElp thEm, in return u'lL gEt a cAlendar n0tEpad.. It's very w0rth it! " hAha.. so mAfAn h0r..? But nvm lA.. d0 with a fEw of my go0diE frEns so quitE ok l0h.. hEez =P

3rd weEk ah.. i wEnt t0 thAiland f0r h0lidAy l0h.. in t0tAl went thEre 4 6dAys bAh. 1st 2dAys we went t0 KanchAnaburi & Ratchaburi.. weird nAmes eh? l0lxXx.. quitE fun bAh.. i get t0 ridE in a trAin lEh!!! my first timE hEez.. we r0de on thE dEath rAilway.. supErb l0h thE scenEry!! l0lxXx thE tEmples were bEautiful... s0me even mAde of g0ld lEh.. wh0a... thE "bEst" are thEir t0liets l0h.. hAv 3 to 4 m0squit0es pEi ni nia0x2 dE!! shi0k h0r?!?! l0lxXx.. thEn the rest of thE trip we hEaded bAck to bAngk0k f0r 3dAys full of sh0ppin!!! yEAH!!! l0lxXx.. our lEgs alm0st br0ke l0h.. hAha.. so mE & my mum went f0r a thAi trAditi0nal mAssage!!! l0lxXx.. vEry funny siA!! shE kEep scrEamin insidE.. i cann0t stAnd lE, thEn lAughed at hEr.. l0lxXx
so cutE mAh.. HAhahAHha.. l0lxXx.. b0ught so0OOooOOo much stuff thAt my pArent's p0ckets b0th hAv extrA lArge h0lEs.. i vEry lihAi bAh.. l0lxXx..

lAst wEek.. wEnt to chAlet l0h.. vEry go0d siA go thEre c0me bAck with xtrA things.. likE bug bitEs & rAsh!!! shi0k h0r? l0lxXx.. hMm.. actuAlly quitE fun dE bAh.. gEt t0 c al0t of shuAi ge's & thE hAlf-nAked b0ds.. hAhahA.. rEally l0h.. rAys0n & my pApa thE b0dy dAmn nice ahh~ pAtrick de als0 n0t bad.. but his skin c0lour nicer l0h.. l0lxXx.. oh yEah the fun pArt is c him drunk siA.. drunk until dAmn cutE ah!! hAhahA i stilL hAv his drunkEned pics insidE my hp.. any0ne wannA c? l0lxXx... thEy sAy i drunk lEh... think so bAh.. i dunn0 wat hAppen only knw thAt i very hAppy & i slApped zhEn & i washEd my fAce whEn zhEn t0ld me t0o.. c0s chAr & zlEx missin mAh.. l0lxXx.. thEn we wEnt f0r a trEasure hunt t0 find th0se 2 ppl.. l0lxXx.. shi0k siA.. wAlk so l0ng.. als0 cann0t find thAt tw0 piggiEs.. hEez =) quitE happy bAh.. i at thE chAlet.. l0lxXx.. hAha

lAtest news ah.. vEry siAn de l0h... **** confessed to mE.. sAy he likEs mE.. s0rt siA.. his eyEs g0t stAmp.. hEhe.. i w0n't accept him bAh.. i mEan.. if i accept him h0r.. i will b lyin t0 him & mysElf l0h.. i dun likE him.. i still likE xXx thEn like this i w0n't b hAppy.. hE als0 mAh.. so.. cann0t l0h.. hAha.. 31st August c0min so0n lE.. i must f0rget ab0ut xXx by thEn bAh.. try l0h.. it's a pr0mise to mysElf lAh.. but arEn't pr0mises mEant t0 b br0ken? hAha.. anywAy.. i think hE trEats my bEtter as a frEn l0h.. l0lxXx.. chErishing every m0ment bAh.. anywAy.. i wAn my ZAIZAI l0lxXx.. mAddiE!!! hEhe.. k lA nitE ppl!!!

blastin' Avril Lavigne's - Happy Ending

So much for my happy ending
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh, oh...

Let's talk this over
It's not like we're dead
Was it something I did?
Was it something You said?
Don't leave me hanging
In a city so dead
Held up so high
On such a breakable thread

You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

CHORUS
You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
All of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh

You've got your dumb friends

I know what they say
They tell you I'm difficult
But so are they
But they don't know me
Do they even know you?
All the things you hide from me
All the shit that you do

You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

CHORUS

It's nice to know that you were there
Thanks for acting like you cared
And making me feel like I was the only one
It's nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall
And letting me know we were done

CHORUS X 2

oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
oh oh, oh oh, oh...

hiyA go0d ppl~ hmM... thEse few days.. l0tsa thingiEs happEned... but onE thing f0r surE tt it's ovEr is thE EXAMS!!! thAnk g0d.. hEhe~ l0lx.. kindA c0nfused... i dunn0 wat i'm thiNkin.. wat i'm d0in.. alL i wanna d0 is slp... i miss xXx al0t... i dunn0 y lEh... n0w listEnin to [ blink's i miss u ] makin it w0rse sia... aiyEr... fucked up life.. i fEel so guilty... i dun wan to causE sk so much pr0blems... it's likE he's suffeRin c0s hE wans t0 bE with mE.... i fEel so fuckin bAd... frEns say... accEpt him, hE's nicE to u... but my hEart d0esn't wanna brEak thE frEnship wE hAve... i mEan.. i dun thiNk i'm go0d en0ugh f0r him.. i kn0w it';s stupid to thiNk this way... but i sEri0usly thiNk i suCk... hAixXx... s0meb0dy savE mE!!!! i've l0st everythin i've g0t, n0w it's timE to eArn thEm back... i'm tryin rEally hard t0 grab h0ld of thEm... it hits mE oncE & flEes off thE next... fuckEd up life.. whEn will this st0p? everythin i've g0t n0w is mE, mysElf & i... nvm la.. l0lx.. i'm powerw0man.. hAhahAh~ s0 bhb... *paisEh* l0lx... hMm... currently thinkin of blah-x... dunn0 wanna tEll him mAh... l0lxXx... eh... n0wadays likE g0t l0ts of tai ji.. zhEn the 0ther day g0t "callEd" by an ah liAn fr0m scho0l.. s0rtz dE.. say shE dia0 thEm... sia0 lo.. wh0 so frEe g0 lo0k at thEm... tmd~ stilL say wat dEcidin slAp hEr.. i actuAlly vEry w0rried for tt sia0zab0r de... but thEn h0r... latEr i g0 find hEr whEn they stilL sEttling thE pr0blEm shE was likE "i w0n't lEt thEm slAp mE dE" hAha.. go0dx2.. shE already vEry angry with thEm lo... c0s thEy calL hEr xialAn... l0lxXx... mAd gAls... hMm... but zhEn sh0uld appreciatE her frEns n0w bah... l0lx.... whEn i t0ld bingcha0 thEy alL ab0ut zhEn thE pr0blem.. thEy were like " lEt's go & hElp zhEn" wah.. so wei da h0r... thEn even the sia0x2 weiming als0 wanna call thE nchs the gAng.. hAha~ sia0lia0.... thEn zhEn stilL g0t hEr yingtiNg & j**** t0 bAck up.. wah.. bigx2 gAng... l0lx... dun w0rry lA.. we alL very guai de... not say vEry naughty la... l0lxXx... hMm... these few days muSic is my life lo.. depending on it t0 survive... hAha.. h0pe it's useful... miss s0me ppl al0t.. hAixXx.. dun wanna think ab0ut it lE... smilE everyb0dy.. hEhe~ muAcki muAckxXx.. miSs yA all!!!
[xXx] s0rry for the 0ther day at stArbucks... didn't mEan to be s0 rudE.. but tt timE feel dAmn weird c0s only gAl.. neEd zab0r likE u t0 pEi mE mah.. l0lxXx... pAisEh...

blastin' Dido's - Whiteflag

I know you think that I shouldn't still love you
I'll tell you that
But if I didn't say it
Well, I'd still have felt it
Where's the sense in that?

I promise I'm not trying to make your life harder
Or return to where we were

Well I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

I know I left too much mess
And destruction to come back again
And I caused but nothing but trouble
I understand if you can't talk to me again
And if you live by the rules of "It's over"
Then I'm sure that that makes sense

Well I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door

I'm in love and always will be

And when we meet
As I'm sure we will
All that was then
Will be there still
I'll let it pass
And hold my tongue
And you will think
That I've moved on

Well I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

Well I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

y0x everyb0dy!! hMm.. t0day dunn0 y g0t mo0d to bl0g leh... ytd g0t al0t of things happEn bah.. mAyb that's y... ytd wE g0 compass mAh.. actuAlly wannA g0 play bbAll dE but thEn s0 lEss ppl g0in, so wE g0 starbuCks find thEm l0... thEn sit thEre study maths... *sibEh guai ritE?* l0lx.. thEn zhEn, suz & ahma g0 find bryan c0s of thE "dEar" plan.. l0lx... n0w i think hE very scarEd of us lE.. everyday harass him.. hAha.. dEar~ l0lx... sibEh sad.. tmd~ farkin USA dunn0 h0w to v0te izzit... lA t0ya l0nd0n sing so0o0o go0d lo... thEy g0 kiCk hEr out... mAkE me wanna cry lE la... hAhax... & erm.. xXx ah.. in c0ffEe bEan thE thing h0r.. i didn't mEan t0 b s0 rudE t0 u la... vEry s0rry l0... thE bingcha0 say i trEat u likE d0g likE tt.. wah sEh... likE i vEry bad... i dunn0 lEh.. vEry bad ah.. k la.. nExt timE trEat u bEtter.. hAha... blah-x g0t talk to mE... s0o0o happy~ l0lx... signin off t0 lAla lAnd lE... nitE y'all... l0vE ya!! muAcki muackxXx...

blastin' Joss Stone's - Fell in love with a boy [ go0d catch ]

Fell in love with a boy
I fell in love once and almost completely
He's in love with the world
And sometimes these feelings can be so misleading
He turns and says, "Are you alright?"
Oh, I must be fine cause my heart's still beating
Come and kiss me by the riverside,
Sarah says it's cool, she don't consider it cheating

Oooh ooh ooh [x4]

Red hair with a curl
Mellow roll for the flavor and the eyes were peepin
Can't keep away from the boy
The two sides of my brain need to have a meeting
Can't think of anything to do
My left brain knows all of love is fleeting
He's just lookin for somethin new
I said it once before but it bears repeating

Oooh oooh ooh [x4]

Can't think of anything to do
My left brain knows all of love is fleeting
He's just lookin for somethin new
I said it once before but it bears repeating

Oooh oooh ooh [x4]

Fell in love with a boy
I fell in love once and almost completely
He's in love with the world and sometimes these feelings can be so misleading
He turns and says, "Are you alright?"
Oh, I must be fine cause my heart's still beating
Come and kiss me by the riverside
Sarah says it's cool, she don't consider it cheating, oh

Don't go telling all my
Don't go telling all my
Don't go telling all my lies on Sarah
Don't go telling all my
Don't go telling all my
Don't go telling all my lies on Sarah

Ooooh oooh oooh [x4]

Can't think of anything to do
My left brain knows all of love is fleeting
He's just looking for something new
I said it once before but it bears repeating

Oooh oooh oooh [x4]

Gonna tell you what's on my mind
I'm gonna tell you what's on my mind
Cause it bears repeating

hEy ppl... I had this urge to blog here today, and i will.... I realised that after i broke up with xXx, i have m0re frens, as the saying g0es, whEn one do0r cl0ses an0ther opEns... we sEemed to be better off as frens... and i have suddenly taken a liking for blah-x, we just seemed to click even th0ugh we haven't talked for ages.. [ about 2yearS? ] a little bit feelings f0r him... a little still for xXx.. so mixed up & confused.. I've been trying to divert my attenti0n to blah-x... It was successful, I've like only friend - friend relati0nship for xXx n0w? I jus dun feel the l0ve anym0re... & i dun rEally kn0w if i wannA dig it back out agAin... But i dunn0 y this very day, i missed xXx al0t... ALOT.... ALOT... It's driving me nuts... I dun like the feeling, i dun like misSin ppl!!!!!! hAhahA~ but yEah i'm stilL the samE ol' crazy mE.. jus a little stressed fr0m the exams.. wh0 cares? i l0ve the stress hEhEhehE~ i'm crazy... miSs ya l0ads xXx... hAha... infatuati0n... *wo0tw0ot*

blastin' Twiggy's - On my own [ peeps wanna hear tt s0ng can ask fr0m mE, twigg u r0ck the hell outta my w0rld.. l0ve ya!! ][ writtEn & comp0sed by twiggs, he sent me this s0ng to heal my br0ken heart.. it helped.. thanks! ]

Dream, I'll dream of you, I'll dream of us, fade away
Pain, It'll never go, Its part of me, need a cure
Numb, numbly depressed, I'm getting dressed, to depress
Lost, i'm not myself, I'm paranoid, no surprise

Now I'm all alone,
Gotta struggle to survive,
And I'll start to wonder,
How I'll make it on my own

Fake, fake smiles and joy, put up an act, i'm appalled
Tears, my only friends, they'll only leave, when you're here

Rose, A Crimson Rose, it signifies, your beauty
End, is this the end? I'll wave goodbye, with a tear

y0x ppl... im kinda wo0zy rite n0w.. so i w0uldn't be sayin much.. jus had s0me wine... my sis says i'm already half drunk.. i dunn0.. haha.. feel so high n0w... any0ne wanna r0ck de h0use? l0lxXx... hMm.. jus talked to that bastard jus n0w.. anyway, i dun gv a shit lo.. whEther u regret stEadin with mE or wats0eva.. pls la.. dunn0 leh, thinkin back, dunn0 whether i really l0ve him mah.. like pls l0.. so fast like an0ther gal le.. like cheatin my feelins say wat shit, huh.. like her since 2 years ag0... aiyah crap la... wat eva l0.. lo0k at my face, d0 i care? No. hahaha~ feelin damn high lo... bEin single de feelin is s0 shuang.. likE a bird.. nExt time lo0k at shuai gE w0n't so guilty lE... hahahaha~ alth0ugh n0w i still feel abit JIAN to like an0ther guy lo.. but wh0 cares ab0ut that jErk? hahaha~ i'm smilin =).. hey syed, i'm smiling like an idi0t rite n0w.. haha... feelin h0rny? hahahaha~ l0lx... had so much fun this week, eh.. can say i f0rget ab0ut him le.... hahaha, or m i jus drunk? i dunn0 leh... w0ozy po0zy.. l0lxXx... hahahaha.... raped s0me guys [ ivan 7 bingcha0... my wife leh ] l0lxXx... hahaha~ kinda fun... ivan so cute sia... l0lx.... yuEn tuck practically to0k off his pants... we g0t pics of him... hahah rape. rape. rape!!!! bingcha0 also hav pics.. so po0r thing sia my la0 po.. nvm la... la0 po they jeal0us of ur b0dy mah... hahaha... po0r thing leh they all, s0me more is gals rape!!! hahaha... l0lxXx.. went out t0day with F4.. fun sia... l0ng time nv like this le.. m0rnin go swimming, then go VJC, then g0 marine parade, thEn g0... orchard, then g0 istana [ i first time g0 in w0r ], thEn g0.... compass.. saw the 1e2' 03 there.. haha fun bunch man... all crazy pE0ple... l0lx... g0t a henna tatt0o... did i tell u this - VJC al0t of shuai gE!!!!!! ahahahha... chi0 bu also al0t w0r.. hMm... co0l scho0l sia.. hahaha... fundae f0r me.. g0nna study like n0w.. but dunn0 h0w to c0s im half drunk.. hahahaha... jus study la babe.. l0lx.. k la, i g0 le.. if n0t later i talk to myself.. l0lx... nite cutiEs~ l0ve ya!

blastin' Groove Coverage's - Mo0nlight Shad0w

Moonlight, Moonlight...
Moonlight shadow

The last that ever she saw him
Carried away by a moonlight shadow
He passed on worried and warning
Carried away by a moonlight shadow

Lost in a riddle that Saturday night
Far away on the other side
He was caught in the middle of a desperate fight
And she couldn't find how to push through

The trees that whisper in the evening
Carried away by a moonlight shadow
Sing a song of sorrow and grieving
Carried away by a moonlight shadow

All she saw was the silhouette of a gun
Far away on the other side
He was shot six times by a man on the run
And she couldn't find how to push through

I stay, I pray
See you in heaven, far away
I stay, I pray
See you in heaven, one day

Four A.M. in the morning
Carried away by a moonlight shadow
I watched your vision falling
Carried away by a moonlight shadow

A star moved slowly in the silvery night
Far away on the other side
Will you come to talk to me this night
But she couldn't find how to push through

I stay, I pray
See you in heaven, far away
I stay, I pray
See you in heaven, one day

Moonlight, Moonlight...
Moonlight shadow
Moonlight, Moonlight
Moonlight shadow

Caught in the middle of a hundred and five
The night was heavy and the air was alive
But she couldn't find how to push through

Carried away by a moonlight shadow
Carried away by a moonlight shadow

y0x pE0ple~ hmM... h0w r ya? i havEn't bEen updating this thing f0r quite s0me time... but i waste this peri0d of timE for somE go0d use k? l0lxXx... i revampEd my bl0g lE.. a wh0le new layout.. nicE bah? l0lxXx.. so pink h0r... l0lxXx... hMm... so wat u guys hav bEen up t0 latEly? miSs mE mah? hahaha~ i gEttin vEry lamE these days.. pr0bably whEn i lamE h0r... i will f0rget ab0ut all my tr0ubles bah...=) blEah~ l0lxXx... hMm.. i th0ught f0r a l0ng time whEn i was on thE way h0me in my fathEr's l0rry... i saw thE stars.. thE mo0n... i dEcided... it's timE t0 lEt go bah... i let g0 bec0s i l0ve him to0 much lE... i dun wanna sh0w it t0 him lE... if hE really wan me, he will naturally c0me back t0 me de.. c0s i'll be waitin f0r him... i w0n't tell him bah... hmm.. my heartaching l0... very xin t0ng dE u knw? l0lxXx.. but God dun wan us t0 be t0gether bah.. mayb n0t now... perhaps mayb in the futurE will hav s0me h0pe.. but thEn i dunn0 whethEr i'll stilL likE him mah... i gvin mysElf 3 months to f0rget ab0ut him... very l0ng rite? haha.. first stEad with marcus to0k ab0ut 2 months bah.. so n0w i think 3 months sh0uld be adequate en0ugh... =).. haha, hE givEs me al0t of mem0ries lo... espEcially whEn i listEn t0 Qing+ian... watch thE mtv.. i dun wan t0 c u lEave first... i dun wan t0 c ur back facing mE first, s0 i think i shall lEave first bah.. bE like thE gal in the mtv l0... haha~ very lamE h0r? but mayb that's the only way i can f0rget ab0ut him bah... l0lxXx... i hEar Qing+ian h0r.. all the mem0ries flo0d back sia.. miSs him al0t.. but thEn it's timE t0 lEt g0.. lEt g0 of the happinEss which seemed t0 appear jus yEsterday... s0metimes bth lE.. will dr0p a tear or tw0 bah... n0 ch0ice... l0ve hurts..=) yet i still bElieve in l0vE... hEhehE~ i wilL remEmber him bah... left a really dEep scar insidE my hEart... alL fulL of 0ur mEm0ries... days whEre wE spEnt timE t0gethEr.. b0ttled up insidE... haixXx... -[pat]- th0ugh u say u n0 feelins f0r mE le, i still hav f0r u l0.... hMm... u say wE'll bE spEcial frEns.. but i dun think it'll happEn lo... in thE end, we'll jus bE n0rmal frEns mah.... it's always like tt de... dun feel guilty ab0ut breakin up with me lo... ur gr0wing up lE.. havin pubErty, mind vEry ficklE.. wat can i d0? i cann0t ask god to stop this w0rld from moving on & head back int0 the past whEre we were so happy t0gether... Everytime i read the chatl0g of us, i l0nged to find the past u again... but i kn0w it's nEva g0nna happen... thEre's only one u... onE & only which left this scar in mE... i dun blame u... hAix.. n0w u may n0t even gv a damn ab0ut mE lo... but i d0.. mayb feelins wilL jus fadE away bah... but the times i spEnt with u r onE of my happiEst.. c0s i hav frEed0m & l0vE... alL fr0m u... really appreciate that... th0ugh we r considEred frens n0w... i rEally h0pe we stilL can g0 out t0gether bah... u kn0w likE crap ar0und? haha.. muS ji0 mE go out k? l0lxXx.. and dun call mE stupid t0 fall in l0ve with u lE... in the first placE, u r the onE wh0 madE me l0ve u this much... =xXx... haixXx... l0lxXx... alL thE best l0, i may n0t be ur drEam gal, but i did tEll u l0tsa things.... =) hEhehE~... haix an0ther failEd relati0nship... s0mEtimes i really wish i c0uld slp f0rever & wake up t0 forget everythin.. alL the past... h0pE it'll happEn to mE... haha... i scared i g0t diabEtes leh.. these few days few so wEak like tt... haix... scared lEh... i dun wanna diE leh... l0lxXx... oh yeah, s0 lucky sia mE... w0n thE readEr digest pil0t pen competit0n.. so happy sia.... l0lxXx... n0w i really hate to be al0ne lo.. last time at lEast hav pat whEn my frens n0t ar0und, but n0w, God has taken everythin away fr0m me le... god pls bring thEm back to mE k? i dun wanna l0se them... hahahA~ b0ught tw0 cd's complimentary fr0m my dad, bEy0nce's dangErously in l0vE & thE l0ving u cd.. damn nicE sia all the s0ngs.... haha.. these few days feel like i crap al0t with ppl.. quite fun bah.. l0lxXx... well, i g2g lE.. nitE all!! l0vE ya!!

blastin' H.I.M's - Funeral of Hearts

Love's the funeral of hearts
And an ode for cruelty
When angels cry blood
On flowers of evil in bloom

The funeral of hearts
And a plea for mercy
When love is a gun
Separating me from you

She was the sun
Shining upon
The tomb of your hopes and dreams so frail
He was the moon
Painting you
With it's glow so vulnerable and pale

Love's the funeral of hearts
And an ode for cruelty
When angels cry blood
On flowers of evil in bloom

The funeral of hearts
And a plea for mercy
When love is a gun
Separating me from you

She was the wind, carrying in
All the troubles and fears here for years tried to forget
He was the fire, restless and wild
And you were like a moth to that flame

The heretic seal beyond divine
Pray to god who's deaf and blind
The last night's the soul's on fire
Three little words and a question why

Love's the funeral of hearts
And an ode for cruelty
When angels cry blood
On flowers of evil in bloom

The funeral of hearts
And a plea for mercy
When love is a gun
Separating me from you

hEy.. n0t feelin really well rite n0w.. t0day really sucked big time.. well i m like already so stressed from the exams, i couldn't concentrate... feelin really weird, like somethin has g0ne wrong... bryan started tellin me about some stuff, he confused the hell outta me, after he finished say, my boday began to shiver... i went c0ld, and my b0dy was sweating like mad, my head went blanked for a moment i sto0d up, wanting to get away, i fell onto the fl0or... at that m0ment, i saw pat's nick, about jasmine... hMm.. i duNn0 wat to say... felt really hurt, mayb he's jus using me to forget ab0ut her... i dunn0... felt really confused, plus bryan's sayin ab0ut wh0m i dunno who is he.. makes my head spin m0re... my body was raging h0t... i c0uldn't take it anym0re i broke down crying... i huddled in a corner, hugged myself & started prayin to god, tell him that i'm ok... I am ok... But the more i pray, the symptons seem to get w0rse... My head spun thoughts about bryan, pat & that shivering... i felt so darn cold..... needed to hug somethin to keep me warm desperately... talked to him, he didn't wanna tell me anythin.. saw his nick again, all those mushy nicks, were they for her? not me... mayb he nv really had feelins for me at all... i dun wanna think about anythin le... my head hurts.... my heart hurts even m0re, i dunno y i wan to put myself int0 this state, i could hav br0ke up with him & suffer n0 more.. but i can't help it, i really l0ve him... mayb i sh0uldn't bah... cos he's not treatin me as a gf either... i dunn0, really need my frens rite n0w... haix... sick.....

blastin' Avril Lavigne's - Don't tell me

You held my hand and walked me home
I know
Why You gave me that kiss it was something
like
this that made me go oh oh
You wiped my tears
Got rid of all my fears
Why did you have to go?
Guess it wasn't enough
To take up some of my love
Gosh it's so hard to trust
Did I not tell you that I'm not like that
Girl who gives it all away e yeahoh
Did you think that I was gonna give it up to
you
this ti-e-i-i ime
Did you think that that there was something
else gonna do
And cry-y-i-y-i
Don't try to tell me what to do
Don't try to tell me what to say
You're better off that way-eyeah
Don't think that your charm and the fact
that your arm is now around my neck
Will get you in my pants
I'll have to kick your ass
and make you never forget
I'm gonna ask you to stop
Thought I liked you a lot but I'm really upset
(im really upset)
So get out of my head

Get off of my bed
Yeah, thats what I said
Did i not tell you that I'm not like that
Girl the one who throws it all away
Did you think that I was gonna give it up to
you
this ti-e-i-i ime
Did you think that there was something else
gonna do
and cry-y-i-y-i
Don't try to tell me what to do
Don't try to tell me what to say
You're better off that way-eyeah
This guilt trip that you put me on
Won't mess me up i've done no wrong
Any thought of you and me have gone away
e-yeah-e-yeah-e-yeah-e-yeahh
Did you think that I was gonna give it up to
you
this ti-e-i-i ime
Did you think that there was something else
gonna do
then cry-y-i-y-i
Don't try to tell me what to do
Don't try to tell me what to say
You're better off that way-eyeah
you're better off that wayyy
im better off along anyway

hiya swEetiEs!! l0ng time since i updated this thing.. hMm... l0tsa stuffiEs happEned.. wEll, s0me go0d somE n0t.. wat can i say... hahaha nvm...l0lxXx lEmme tell ya wat happEned ytd.... hEhehE~

Saturday - 17th April
Went out with my h0mies [ carla, twiggy & ryan ], lala-banana has measlEs... aWw... hahaha, ok yeah, went 0ut with thEm f0r dinNer.. we c0uldn't make up our mind to eat @ where, ended up at KFC.. l0lxXx.. met up with lydia & sikai there... da gang thought tt SIKAI (of all ppl) was my bf.. c0s he sat d0wn there & kinda lo0ked at them.. l0lxXx.. i was laughin like an idi0t then... hahaha... went f0r bball after that with pat & sikai... freakin pat.. l0lxXx c CARLA so shy... walk away, *u heng she think u as n0t bad k!! lolx.. anti-s0cial to0..l0lxXx* then we seperated... i th0ught they w0uld go h0me.. BUT they came to the bball c0urt to l0ok for us.. hahaha.. po0r pat.. l0lxXx.. thEn after bball we went t0 grab somethin t0 eat.. the ramli burger izzit? aiight... yumMy!! hehEhe~ then wanted t0 walk pat t0 the bus-st0p but his bus came le... thEn i remembered one thing i t0ld sikai last time... haha, u kn0w in ur life u have like so many regrets on wat decisi0ns we made? yeah this is one of them... i miss the days where he sends me h0me... laughin, talkin on the bus ride... all that, really miss em, & to think i used to n0t wan him to send me h0me cos i was afraid tt my dad or neighb0ur w0uld caught us... sweet memories... sometimes i'm als0 rather afraid tt hew0uld fall for carla, but i can't blame him for that.. she's dr0p dead gorge0us... so wh0 w0uldn't? jus dun wan him t0 leave my side again... haixXx... eEk, dunn0 y so l0ve sick l0lxXx...

t0day - 18th April
Can say i have been really t0lerant today? haha *go0d j0b samMie* my mum's so weird... whEn i w0ke up, she started sc0ldin & cursin me... erm, the usual shit ab0ut me being a l0ser yada yada... and my kids being as dumb as mE... oh well, she's really pissed at s0methin which has happened t0 my family i guessed... well she started calling me names, i c0uldn't take it anym0re i called her to shut up... she always takes this opp0rtunity when dad is n0t around t0 scream her head off me... that's y pEeps i l0ve my dada al0t!!!! hMM.... then XH came online & started to tell me wateva rum0ur shit the guys were sayin... that mE & pat's relati0nship is n0t stable... aiyah.. i dun wanna say anythin l0... c0s it's likE, wateva i say ur will still have ur own thinking rite? so i let ur think wateva ur wan bah... but to get this d0wn right clear here... me & pat r ok.. we patch lE.... fine? happy? argh... i'm happy with him lo... s0 dun keep askin me ab0ut whether we jus br0ke up or our relati0nship n0t stable izzit... hahaha~ really weird th0ugh, when XH t0ld me i wanna laugh, he asked me first, " u & pat break le rite?" then ask "ur tw0 relationship n0t stable ah?", i was like wtf~ u sayin, if we break le, relationship still will not stable meh? dun even hav a relationship le mah! hahaha~ l0lxXxXx... lemme laugh bah, stay in this hell for one wh0le day can diE le... cann0t go out.... stupid mum... haixXx, l0lxXx.. i tell u ah, she can make u cry de l0... that stupid w0men & her mouth.... really stabbed my heart.... nvm la, i was like * i have 2 rejoice, yeah rejoice!!!!* l0lxXx... misSed pat so much... really wish tt he's right here right n0w, for me t0 cuddle.. yeah!!! l0lxXx need b0dy warmth.... hahahhaa! yuCk~ so horny suddenly.. hahaha~ miss him.love him.want him.need him. hehEheeHE~ aiight, k i'm like g0nna study n0w... man, my body is so itch.. dun tell me i hav MEASLES!!!! l0lxXx.. k la... nitE my l0vely pe0ple...!!!!

blastin' Blink 182's - I miss you

Hello there, the angel from my nightmare
The shadow in the background of the morgue
The unsuspecting victim of darkness in the valley
We can live like Jack and Sally if we want
Where you can always find me
We'll have Halloween on Christmas
And in the night we'll wish this never ends
We'll wish this never ends (miss you miss you, miss you miss you)

Where are you and I'm so sorry
I cannot sleep I cannot dream tonight
I need somebody and always
This sick strange darkness
Comes creeping on so haunting every time
And as I stared I counted
Webs from all the spiders
Catching things and eating their insides
Like indecision to call you
and hear your voice of treason
Will you come home and stop this pain tonight
Stop this pain tonight

Don't waste your time on me you're already
The voice inside my head (miss you miss you)
Don't waste your time on me you're already
The voice inside my head (miss you miss you)

Don't waste your time on me you're already
The voice inside my head (miss you miss you)
Don't waste your time on me you're already
The voice inside my head (miss you miss you)

Don't waste your time on me you're already
The voice inside my head (miss you miss you)
Don't waste your time on me you're already
The voice inside my head (miss you miss you)
(miss you miss you, miss you miss you, miss you miss you)

y0zziE earthlings..!! why? tell mE why?!?! hAix... havin PMS which is like so sickEnin... really a crappy nite f0r me... i m so pissed & feelin so h0t.. wanna take a bath later.. why pat & mE like n0thin happen like tt? i w0nder if it's for real, i h0pe God would d0 somethin.. i hav been takin the initiative.. that i'm so siCk of it? i mean like, ain't it n0w his turn? haixXx... wat can i d0? i dunn0.. i jus misS him al0t, i guess i really cann0t compete against his frens and RO. maybE we just stead for a name? i duNno... really c0nfused rite n0w... well saw him grabbing Janice's hand just n0w, i mean like really h0lding it... playing with her... h0w come he couldn't d0 the same to me? m i that scary? saw him talking t0 eileen al0ne jus n0w... y can't he talk to mE like that to0, d0 we really have n0thin to talk ab0ut? saw him taking pictures with jEnny in class, which made me remember wat he said t0 me the other time " i w0n't take with u c0s with u inside the piCture, it'll be s0 damn ugly.." i kn0w he's jus j0kin la, but i can't help remembering it... Just really wish that we c0uld go back int0 the past again... where i am really very happy being with him and vice versa... Days where we spent online playin games or g0in out, having fun t0gether. Nights where we lay on the ro0fgarden talkin & chattin... i really miSs the old times... is God goin to give them back to me? Maybe i am thinking to0 much cause i'm having my peri0d blah blah blah, but i really wish mem0ries of 2003 will return again, days of fun & laughter... and l0ve.. Maybe writing here w0uld not be of use c0s he hardly reads my bl0g, but i really wish he c0uld take the initiative, i feel really shy asking him stuff... i duNn0 y... and even when lydia t0ld me this: when lydia, ah ma, pat & yj + lydia's sis were at ah ma's hse d0in project, lydia's sis s0rta had a crush on pat & called him " xia0 shuai gE", she asked him y hE l0ved me so muCh, he jus replied.. " very very very very much lor... yeah jus very much lor.." haha lydia t0ld me this i was like flushed RED.. blushing like mad k... i mean like that's really sweet, but h0w come he d0esn't tell me!!! hahaha~ i m MAD, oh well, h0pe my d3ar slEep tite, misS him l0ts today... dunN0 y... feelin a lil bit h0rny? hahahha~ ok0k i'll shut the crap.. l0ve him... haha h0pe tt God would do something about us.. hEhe~
had NAPFA test t0day, i think i did well? I am really happy with my results lo... no regrets.. haha TYGod... but my freakin maths test.. didn't d0 the last questi0n cos lack of time.. so freakin angry man... wanted t0 burst out in tears lE.... hahhaa
oh well, h0pe that all things g0es smo0thly for every1.. really misS that pigGy al0t.. hahahhaa.. all i can think of now is him.. Him... HIM.... hMm.. if he ever reads this... i will try t0 help to impr0ve our relationship k? hehehe~ aiyah, dun play to0 much RO la.. ppl will l0nely de... LOLX... that's all, well i'm g0in to bathe... nite angels! l0vE ya babE!

blastin' Frente's - Bizarre Love Triangle

Every time I think of you
I get a shot right through
Into a bolt of blue
It's no problem of mine
But it's a problem I find
Living the life that I can't leave behind
There's no sense in telling me
The wisdom of a fool won't set you free
But that's the way that it goes
And it's what nobody knows
And every day my confusion grows
Every time I see you falling
I get down on my knees and pray
I'm waiting for the final moment
You say the words that I can't say

I feel fine and I feel good
I feel like I never should
Whenever I get this way
I just don't know what to say
Why can't we be ourselves like we were yesterday
I'm not sure what this could mean
I don't think you're what you seem
I do admit to myself
That if I hurt someone else
Then I'll never see just what we're meant to be
Every time I see you falling
I get down on my knees and pray
I'm waiting for the final moment
You'll say the words that I can't say
Every time I see you falling
I'll get down on my knees and pray
I'm waiting for the final moment
You'll say the words that I can't say

hiyA b0diEs!! l0lxXx.. bEen reAlly b0nkErs for thE past fEw days.. hAhahAhaHAa.. l0lxXx C i t0ld ya!!!! wEnt t0 chuRch t0day to praiSe thE l0rd, learnt fr0m past0r princE tt n0 matteR wat, g0d wants us t0 rej0ice, c0s if we feel sad, depressed or hurt.. we are turning ourselves t0 the devil, wh0 makes us l0se faith in 0urself & the almighty g0d.. n0 mattEr wat, d0 have faith... hEhehEhe~ f0r eg, if ur siCk, say uR healed.. uR blesSings wilL c0me one day!
nExt to0k piCtures with zhEn, can say quitE nic3? ate pasta till i wanna thr0w up all those creamy stufF! eEk~ then went t0 the esplanade's library.. really l0ve that place al0t, it's so beautiful & well furnished, w0uld love to g0 back there again next week.. heEz! came back h0me around 2pm.. lay d0wn on my bed, wishing t0 have some beauty sleep.. then SUDDENLY the ph0ne ring, great i have pr0ject @ 5.30pm @ ah ma's hse.. so tired le leh.... zZzzZz. n0 choice went f0r pr0ject, came h0me around 10pm.. wah so tired.. haven't completed homew0rk yet.. i m so dead man... *c0ngrats sam* oh well, c wat i can d0 tmr... hEheHehe.. c ya in dream l4nd guys! later~

blastin Hoobastank's - The Reason

I'm not a perfect person
As many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why i need you to hear

I've found a resaon for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You [x4]

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

haha.. happiest day of my life? i opened my golden mouth & asked pat f0r a patch.. luck was on my side he said "gimme a few days to think about" ahaha really glad he gave this kinda answer.. sh0ws that he gr0w up le!! s0 proud of him.. l0lxXx.. really went b0nkers today.. perhaps i'm to0 tired le bah... need t0 sleep lolxXx... haha.. l0ve patty al0t.. dunn0 y.. he say i very stupid to love him.. but i dun think s0 leh... even th0ugh he thinks he's n0thing.. to me he's everythin!! hEheHehe~ n0 one can fight l0ve bah.. =) really very happy...!! xie le la0 pa!!! if u nv give me inspirati0n to think ab0ut this... today i'll still b m0urning over him.. hahaha... but pri0rity to studies first l0.. i dun wan to keep slacking le.. must BUCK UP!!! t0day had my oral examinati0n.. freaky man, the examiner is misS ong!! but, i didn't kn0w i feel so c0mfortable talking to her.. mayb i say l0tsa crap bah... but quite stressful, dun hav to think of anythin.. hehehehe! i guess ppl have thier go0d & bad days... this is one of the many go0d days god has given me.. i'll treasure it dearly!! & never let it g0!!! heHEheEhehe~ well l0ve ya l0ts ---> pat =P *muack*

blastin' Lionel Richie & Diana Ross's duet - Endless Love

My love,
There's only you in my life
The only thing that's bright

My first love,
You're every breath that I take
You're every step I make

And I
(I-I-I-I-I)
I want to share
All my love with you
No one else will do...

And your eyes
Your eyes, your eyes
They tell me how much you care
Ooh yes, you will always be
My endless love

Two hearts,
Two hearts that beat as one
Our lives have just begun

Forever
(Ohhhhhh)
I'll hold you close in my arms
I can't resist your charms

And love
Oh, love
I'll be a fool
For you,
I'm sure
You know I don't mind
Oh, you know I don't mind

'Cause you,
You mean the world to me
Oh
I know
I know
I've found in you
My endless love

Oooh-woow
Boom, boom
Boom, boom, boom, boom, booom
Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom

Oooh, and love
Oh, love
I'll be that fool
For you,
I'm sure
You know I don't mind
Oh you know-
I don't mind

And, YES
You'll be the only one
'Cause NO one can deny
This love I have inside
And I'll give it all to you
My love
My love, my love
My endless love

go0d friday, this very day i pray t0 g0d. my onE & only chance f0r a miracle t0 happEn. my h0pe. my dream. my happiness. i pray t0 dear l0rd jesus, for an0ther miracle, t0 be back with pat again. will it happen? g0d knows best. i made a bet with alex, if char nv puts her head on his sh0ulder, i'll treat him t0 a bubblE tea, if i g0t rejected by pat if i ask f0r a patch, he'll treat mE bubble tea. if he rejects me, i dun think i'll be sad bah, i mean like we can still be frens.. & i get my bubble tea.. but i really h0pe he accepts me.. miss him s0 much.. realise i really l0ve that guy al0t... y s0 much?? l0ve is blind... oh well en0ugh about that guy.. =P s0rta happy & fun day t0day, actually this m0rning i was like s0 damn freakin tirEd, but that bryan w0ke me up with his sms.. zZzzZ there g0es my beauty sleep!! l0lxXx i want3d to g0 to his church play, but there's exam tmr!! *sorry bryan*.. i was kinda pissed with zhEn, char & alex lo.. trying very hard to contact them, wanted to ask if they wanna meet up t0 buy the prezzie f0r pei yu... BUT th0se 3 weird0s nv answer their hp... then i went to meet suZ t0 buy pei yu's present * thank g0d for suzziE* b0ught her a really superbly cute ph0to frame!! ahHh.. i l0ve it man.. lolxXx went t0 pei yu's bday party.. can considered that it was a blast??? l0lxXx had so much fun playin bball * bball!!! so0o0oo long nv t0uch le* lolxXx.. love it man!! then rachel & uS made a bet lo.. if any0ne of us sho0t a 3 pointer in.. she will stead with yuEn tuck.. l0lxXx we were 0nly given once chance lo.. l0lxXx being lucky, mine went in.. ahahaha rachel was like screamin l0.. so cutE.. hahaha.. she keep sayin she dun wan... but we ask her t0 give it a try l0.. yuen tuCk is a go0d man... hehEhehEhe~ n0t my fault k... i didn't kn0w i was THIS lucky.. lolxXx.. then we all piggEd out at pei yu's hse.. talked ab0ut stuff lo... haha happy day th0ugh really happie.. miss him l0ts... hEheHehe... if i ask him t0 patch... will he patch with mE? answEr me can? l0lxXx.. PLS!!! haha
nitE!

blastin' Craig David's - You don't miss your water ( till the well runs dry )

As I sail with you across the finest oceans
On a way to find the key to our emotions
Together we will move the clouds to brighter days
Some people question what I say
Tried to break up you and me
But I know this love between us is growing stronger
You can call me whenever from wherever
Just remember that
I'll be there
Through all the stormy weather
Us break up never
No we'll be together
Forever

You don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry
But I believe so strongly in you and I
Can somebody answer me the question why
You don't miss your water til the well runs dry

As I close my eyes
Sit back while reminiscing
Of when we used to fuss and fight but end up kissing
There may be sad and pain for time so long to wait
But in my heart you'll always be everything and more to me
For I know this love between us is growing stronger
You can call me whenever from wherever
Just remember that
I'll be there
Through all the stormy weather
Us break up never
No we'll be together
Forever

You don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry
But I believe so strongly in you and I
Can somebody answer me the question why
You don't miss your water til the well runs dry

For you are always on my mind
You are always on my mind
Girl you know that you
You are always
You are always on my mind
You are always forever

You don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry
But I believe so strongly in you and I
Can somebody answer me the question why
You don't miss your water til the well runs dry

You don't miss your water girl no
But I believe so strongly in you and I yeah
Can somebody answer me the question why
Cause you don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry yeah listen
If you ever get the feeling
You wanna play around starting cheating, remember
You don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry

hiya pe0ple.. =) haha.. ytd dunn0 sad or happy leh.. pr0bably during netball tt time i'm kinda upset l0.. c0ach ke3p sc0lding me.. say i cann0t catch ball pr0perly.. i really tri3d my best l0... haix feel like this w0rld is so distant fr0m me.. firstly studiEs dr0p, next xXx n0t here lia0, m0reover netball skills bec0me w0rse.. y like tt? Can g0d dun take everything that i have away fr0m me? I really need thEm lo.. haixXx.. nEtball that time bth le then cry... thinking, i cause the team cann0t play netball like that.. haix.. i cann0t afford t0 n0t have netball.. i vent all my frustrati0ns on netball, then maybe i'll be happy lo... but ytd think lE think lE... think of the past again.... i trying my best t0 forget it... but everytime i see him, my life lits up... i have never felt s0 happy bef0re bah.. maybe like this also go0d en0ugh...? talking t0 him already sparks up everything... l0sin him was the w0rst... i am c0ping... need t0 get used to a life with0ut him bah.. but i just can't help thinking ab0ut him... =S... *sighs* deep in my heart really wish t0 shout to the w0rld how much i miss him, but will the w0rld care? only i d0... s0metimes when i think i am truly very happy, i start t0 wonder... why? why am i happy? why must i be happy? am i really this happy? Memories will then flo0d back in my mind again... Love can make life seem like a paradise to live in, it can also make life like hell.. but for me, it t0uched me to the edge of the w0rld, bringing me places i've never been, making my heart be filled with different types of em0tions and most of all see life in a different perspective.. Perhaps time will tell why i loved him so much? Perhaps.. Perhaps, it c0uld even make me see how stupid i am to fall so deeply in l0ve..? Perhaps.. But nothing can st0p me fr0m loving him.. What d0ne is d0ne, my em0tions are fixed.. Yes, i kn0w we may n0t be t0gether, i may fall f0r some0ne else, but, he made an unerasable impression in my heart and i'll always remember him.. =) all i can d0 now is ask g0d for a miracle.. pray that maybe fate will give us a chance again..=)

blastin' Dreamz FM's - Should i stay

Had a drive
Driven by your love
But when you messed around
I lost the drive I found

Thought you needed
Needed someone true
But you changed your mind
Or had I failed you?

Wish you’d been
Careful with my heart
But you tore it apart
And broke an angel’s heart

The kiss was true
Has to end somehow
But I am livin’ proof of what love is about

It’s hard holding you
Loving you, losing you
It’s sad to be true
And be fooled by you
I don’t know (I don’t know)
I gotta know
Should I stay or should I go?

You played me on
Played me like a clown
But I feel for you
Eventhough I’m down

My heart is heavy
Heavy like a rock
But I am so amused
You’re still in my thoughts

It’s hard holding you
Loving you, losing you
It’s sad to be true
And be fooled by you
I don’t know (I don’t know)
I gotta know
Should I stay or should I go?

Oooohh…should I stay?
Should I go?

It’s hard holding you
Loving you, losing you
It’s sad to be true
And be fooled by you
I don’t know (I don’t know)
I gotta know
Should I stay or should I go?

This time its done
It’ll never feel the same
But we had some good times
Guess it’s sad just the same

I guess the truth
Doesn’t matter somehow
But you were livin’ proof of what love is about…

hiya.. hmM.. 2nd day tt me & pat br0ke up le.. cried and th0ught about it the wh0le aftern0on, everytime my frens tell me t0 not think ab0ut it, i will remember an occasion where we are t0gether, like lo0kin at the stars at night, lying on the roofgarden, g0ing to little india t0gether during deepavali, spending xmas t0gether, walking at orchard r0ad, all the crap & nonsense we talk till dawn, us playing bball t0gether, having fun last year.. s0 much... i'm g0ing to take it sl0wly bah.. alth0ugh this relationship is a failure, but he cann0t stop me fr0m liking him... i am h0ping f0r a miracle t0 happen again, just wish that almighty g0d would bless us once again.. didn't eat f0r almost the wh0le day, spent it on crying, d0in homew0rk & thinking...i am s0 glad that we c0uld stand an0ther chance again... i think i've fallen s0 deep in l0ve & g0t shattered that's why i never ever wanna l0ve any0ne when we first stead... But after i met pat, i realise that pe0ple do n0t appreciate things, s0me stuff y0u let g0.. it'll be g0ne 4ever.. Loving him is the m0st unregretful decisi0n i ever made in my life, alth0ugh it br0ke my heart which is still hurting n0w, I am s0 glad that i was with him... Great catch, great guy,t0 me he is just perfect.. You guys may object or what s0 ever... but he really changed my life tremend0usly.. He gave me h0pe, supp0rt, care & l0ve, m0re than i can ask f0r..Probably, the saddest thing w0uld be that he thinks i g0t a thing with bryan?? When he t0ld me that, i wanted t0 tell him that i have s0lely loved him f0r all my life... Yet he said that, which means.. he d0es n0t trust me? More or less, i am als0 upset that he wants t0 end our relationship just like that, i th0ught we w0uld last, h0ld on... y0u kn0w that sorta thing? Hope that we w0uld patch up one day bah.. be it one week, one m0nth or even a year, i w0uld be waiting f0r him... i cann0t seem to f0rget ab0ut him in just a day 0r tw0... He's special... You know that? i really am trying my best t0 forget about the sweet mem0ries we used to share, trying t0 move on with my life, but there was s0 much happiness i experienced last time.. Will I be able to experience it again? With him? Read our chatlogs again... Really miss him al0t alot... I d0n't wish to cry f0r him, but the tears just dr0p out naturally.. the only time when i am happy is when we talk.. Pat, please give us a chance in the future won't ya? May not be right n0w or anything.. But please if y0u still like me give us a chance.. I sound so desperate.. But only desperate f0r him bah... if only i said i did n0t wanna listen t0 wateva he said last night, if only i did n0t agree t0 break up... But will we be happy? Haix.. just need him... So sad, i just cannot believe our l0ve was this sh0rt... reading the 0ld chatl0gs, made me wanna burst out in tears again... I still love him al0t.. Hope god will give us a chance... Haix. 7 months... So much stuff happened... Now it's like ain't any better, kn0wing that i l0ve u.. but i can't have u... dunn0 wat to d0.... life sux.... Thanks pat... f0r all tt u have d0ne...

blastin' Sheryl Cr0w's - First Cut is the Deepest

I would have given you all of my heart
but there's someone who's torn it apart
and she's taking almost all that I've got
but if you want, I'll try to love again
baby I'll try to love again but I know

The first cut is the deepest, baby I know
The first cut is the deepest
'cause when it comes to being lucky she's cursed
when it comes to lovin' me she's worst
but when it comes to being loved she's first
that's how I know

The first cut is the deepest, baby I know
The first cut is the deepest

I still want you by my side

just to help me dry the tears that I've cried
cause I'm sure gonna give you a try
and if you want, I'll try to love again
but baby, I'll try to love again, but I know

The first cut is the deepest, baby I know
The first cut is the deepest

'Cause when it comes to being lucky she's cursed
when it comes to lovin' me she's worst
but when it comes to being loved she's first
that's how I know

The first cut is the deepest, baby I know
The first cut is the deepest

haix.. 7 months together, it's finally over... i made up my mind wanting to break.. But i couldn't... He broke the news to me... But why am i still crying? I love him alot... I don't care who is reading this.. Why g0d can't give us another chance? I dunno how to tell my frens... i scared when i break the news.. i will be crying again.. i very sad... wish to die in bed.. sleep forever... d0n't wish to talk le..

blastin' Boxcar Racer's - There is

this vacation's useless
these white pills aren't kind
i've given a lot of thought on this 13-hour drive
i missed the grinding concrete where we sat past 8 or 9
and slowly finished laughing in the glow of our headlights
i've given a lot of thought to the nights we use to have
the days have come and gone
our lives when but so fast
i faintly remember breathing on your bedroom floor
where i laid and told you but you sweared you loved me more

do you care if i don't know what to say
will you sleep tonight or will you think of me
will i shake this off pretend its all okay
that there someone out there who feels just like me
there is

those notes you wrote me
i've kept them all
i'll give a lot of thought of how to write you back this fall

with every single letter in every single word there
will be a hidden message about a boy that's
loves a girl
do you care if i don't know what to say
will you sleep tonight or will you think of me
will i shake this off
pretend its all okay that there's someone out there who feels just like me
there is

do you care if i don't know what to say?
will you sleep tonight or will you think of me
will i shake this off
pretend its all okay that there's someone out there who feels just like me

do you care if i don't know what to say?
will you sleep tonight or will you think of me
will i shake this off
pretend its all okay that there's someone out there who feels just like me
there is

haix.. al0t of things happen this week.. b0th happy and sad... Never l0g online f0r 5 days lE... miSs my c0mputer sia... but misS him even m0re... ( l0st chance 2 talk 2 hiM ) hmM.. lemmE say the wh0le of this week bah..

- m0nday -
0n Sun already hav s0me rum0urs that Jiax2 like pat, pat like janice all th0se crap already.. but i ch0se not to believe it, rum0urs only wat... it's n0t true.. m0reover, i want t0 trust him... Every0ne just say l0... haix.. make me s0 pissed off lo.. keep saying i n0t jealous meh... l0lxXx.. n0pe not at all.... f0r the first & the last time i mean it.. i trust him... That day i was s0 freakin mad i vent it all on netball... i th0ught the next day w0uld b better... but i was wr0ng..

- tuesd4y -
he started av0idin me... i s0 l0nely.. no one to talk t0 then i asked suzanNe t0 call mE *thanks mEi* really need s0meone t0 talk to... then i smsed him.. he reply like givin the *dun-talk-t0-me* attitude.. make me s0 sad.. i br0ke my pr0mise.. i cried again...

- wednesday -
went t0 cdac... the guys ( ivan, weiming,r0ngli,pat ) were tryin t0 make each other faint... then i saw him faint l0... u kn0w very scary mah... i t0ld zhen they all b4 i dreamt that he died b4..... s0 scary then c him faint.. my heart beat s0 fast.... like wanna jump out fr0m my body.. so i got over it by laughin lo... that ivan ah.. faint le.. walk walk walk... i th0ught he goin to vomit.. but when he regain conciousness, he was like " h0w come i'm here..? i th0ught i was there de?" lolx... cute~

- thursd4y -
bo0~! scared? haha april fo0ls day... had s0 much fun t0day.. played with fl0ur,water n p0wder... hahaha.. heng hav relief teacher f0r the last peri0d... but we spent it by d0in a strategy on h0w to attack the 2e4 b0ys.. wth~ our class hav tw0 betrayers.. *pat & rays0n* lolx haha.. so straight after class... we ran to the normal acad blocks n hid in the gals t0liet... nicholas, lydia & herman stay in class to lure them away.. s0 we went int0 2e4, grab alex's & weilo0n's bag n pour flour inside.. lolx... then to0k wateva weap0ns they br0ugh.. *st0le alex's water gun & hair gel... then they saw us with the water gun, so we ran all the way to the sec 1 express the gal's t0liet n stayed there... but they h0r.. not scared de... c0me in the toliet n snatch.. lolx charlene use water gun attack i thr0w flour & hair gel at them.. lolx... then that couple h0r.. char n alex... alex go right int0 the toliet wan to snatch, then char dun gv him... s0 she kicked his xia0 didi... l0lx.. twice! he said it was painful... haha.. s0 fun!! their b0dies very er xing lo... i put the hair wax all over them... oily... hahaha... then later we went back t0 class.. -.-pengzz~ s0 much fl0ur!!! n we have t0 clean up l0... they say wat edwin n0t happy, wanna beat us up liao.... $@!% him lo... haha... then we clean... i g0in toliet tt time, stupid alex, he take his water gun headsh0t at me.. all the water go in my ear!!!!! KA0!!! then i go take revenge fill my water b0ttle then i p0ur all over him... muahahahaha gals r0ck! haha... then later at night.. so l0nely again, bryan called me lo... then we talk talk talk until 11.45pm.. then i cann0t stand le.. g0 slp.. lolx..

- friday -
quite sad bah... he m0ody then av0id me? haix.. dunno leh... so bth le i jus cry on the bus lo.... dun wan anyone t0 c... then heng g0t mahjong to save me... i play lo.. play n play n play.. l0lx.. then later he like treat me ok liao.. on the bus hav talk t0 me... my happiest bus ride ever... haha...

haiix.. later goin t0 bugis with them... h0pe it'll b a fine puuurfect day bah =)

blastin' Nelly Furtado's - Try

All I know
Is everything is not as it's sold
but the more I grow the less I know
And I have lived so many lives
Though I'm not old
And the more I see, the less I grow
The fewer the seeds the more I sow

Then I see you standing there
Wanting more from me
And all I can do is try
Then I see you standing there
Wanting more from me
And all I can do is try

I wish I hadn't seen all of the realness
And all the real people are really not real at all
The more I learn the more I cry
As I say goodbye to the way of life

I thought I had designed for me

Then I see you standing there
Wanting more from me
And all I can do is try
Then I see you standing there
I'm all I'll ever be
But all I can do is try
Try

All of the moments that already passed
We'll try to go back and make them last
All of the things we want each other to be
We never will be
And that's wonderful, and that's life
And that's you, baby
This is me, baby
And we are, we are, we are, we are
Free
In our love
We are free in our love

haha.. s0 many pPl kEep askin mE t0 updat3 my bl0g.. so s0rry.. mE ( thiS pig ) to0 lazy lE.... haha, these few days i learnt s0mething, i CANNOT b unhappy lE... mus always bE happy even th0ugh n0t happy, thEn i will n0t b s0 negativE... Really l0ve my life n0w lo... cos evErythin g0in very smo0thly xcept f0r my studiEs nEed 2 buCk up le.. I WAN TUITION!!! lolxXx... haha i realise s0methin leh... i like playin gb with pat... hE in gb like so shuai likE tt sia.. s0 pro... c lE every1 will envy l0lxXx... thEn everytimE tag witH him, likE *wah, i with a pr0* lolx... s0 happy!! hEhehEhehEhe~ erm.. yeah, saw tt jasminE* in thE t0liet noh.. shE so scary sia... hahaha, kEep lo0kin at mE... i th0ught i dE zui ppl... she very cutE lEh!!!! lolxXx hEr st34d so talL... I WAN HIS HEIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!! lolx.. latEr no onE wan mE... hahaha.. yEah al0t of things happEn this wEek l0... Suz finally g0t over si kai.. likE s0meone else... but tt bastard s0 damn flirt, he t0ld her he likes s0meone else le..!!! *b0ilin* WTF~ u stupid m0ron, think u s0 go0d ah.. go play with her feElins... i wilL whack u dE!!!!! h0pe Suz can get over him to0.. mEi* it's jus an infatuation only... dun b s0 sad alright? thEse few days hav the mo0d 2 play mahj0ng.. duNn0 y lEh.. think very fun bah, thE pong~hu~chi~ very exciting.. lolx thEse few days can say i hav g0ne craziEr... duNno y.. m i weird? anyway, i dun gv a damn.. haha.. wann4 g0 watch my girl~ leh... but n0body wanna pEi me g0... so b0red stuck @ home... pls ask mE out!!!! hahaha... k la... very latE le... dun wish to writE lia0... nitE pPl!!

blastin' Maro0n 5 - This l0vE...

I was so high I did not recognize
The fire burning in her eyes
The chaos that controlled my mind
Whispered goodbye and she got on a plane
Never to return again
But always in my heart

This love has taken its toll on me
She said Goodbye too many times before
And her heart is breaking in front of me
I have no choice cause I won't say goodbye anymore

I tried my best to feed her appetite
Keep her coming every night
So hard to keep her satisfied
Kept playing love like it was just a game

Pretending to feel the same
Then turn around and leave again

This love has taken its toll on me
She said Goodbye too many times before
And her heart is breaking in front of me
I have no choice cause I won't say goodbye anymore

I'll fix these broken things
Repair your broken wings
And make sure everything's alright
My pressure on her hips
Sinking my fingertips
Into every inch of you
Cause I know that's what you want me to do

haix.. so many days i havE n0t updatEd le... feEling s0 siCk... l0nely...... every0ne so craZed over mahj0ng... fun la, fun until n0 onE to talk t0.. i say "hi" t0 pat dunn0 h0w many timEs le.. he never reply... s0me more everytme aftEr i say "hi" he g0es offlinE... bl0ck mE izzit.. *lao ma, i takin initiativE h0r... but everytimE i did, i'm negleCted? *sighs... i t0ld myself lE.. get 0veR him, get ovEr him, gEt oveR him!!! but in thE end i end up thiNking ab0ut thiS kinda stuff... s0metimEs i wiSh we weRe nevEr t0gethEr.. just bE friEnds will d0... maybE then i wilL n0t g0 thr0ugh so many sad timEs bah.. i think iS bec0s of him dE... *sighs... dunn0 wat 2 say, dunNo wat 2 beliEve, n0thin u saiD bef0re is c0ming truE... i likE mahjong, u likE it to0.. but onE day if i lay siCk here... n ovEr there is a mahj0ng gamE where all uR friEnds r asKin y0u to j0in... whiCh wilL u cho0se? mahj0ng or seE me? surEly mahj0ng dE... no d0ubts ab0ut it... wat's supposed to b thought ab0ut hav already beEn thought... wat's supposed to be cried ab0ut.... thE tears have already dr0pped... can't changE time... n0w things can only be healed... i dun wanna think so much about u le.. wastin my time, love, makin me so heartbr0ken.... i'm giving u the freed0m to cho0se le.... maybe somewhere out there, there is the right gal f0r u... cos i kn0w i'm not the one... so s0rry... haix.... really tirEd n0w.... but dun feel like sleEpin... ytd was the suCkiest day ever in hist0ry.... havin mo0dswings... ppl who not afraid to hav a crappy timE... comE talk to me.... haix..... so l0nely... wanna talk to ppl.... ARGH....

sui ran bu xiang he ni zai yi qi,
dan shi xin li bu xiang fang qi,
yuan ben yi wei wo men neng yong yuan de,
dan ni de biao qing shuo de gang hao xiang fan,
wo bu d0ng zi ji zai xiang she me...
zi chi da0 xin li hao fan, zhen de hen fan...

blastin' Ewan Mcgregor's - Your Song [soundtrack from the musical - moulin rouge]

My gift is my song
And this one's for you
And you can tell everybody
That this is your song
It maybe quite simple
But now that it's done
Hope you don't mind
I hope you don't mind
That I put down in words
How wonderful life is now you're in the world

Sat on the roof
And I kicked off the moss
Well some of the verses well
They got me quite cross
But the sun's been kind
While I wrote this song
It's for people like you that
Keep it turned on

So excuse me for forgetting
But these things I do
You see I've forgotten
If they're green or they're blue
Anyway the thing is what I really mean
Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen

And you can tell everybody
This is your song
It may be quite simple
But now that it's done
I hope you don't mind
I hope you don't mind that I put down in words

How wonderful life is now you're in the world
I hope you don't mind
I hope you don't mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is now you're in the world

ytd i didn't wanna write anything inside here, cos i was to0 tired.. I guess I am the main pr0blem of everythin.. Every single freakin thing, that's why i decided to change.. I rather keep quiet le, cos everytimei say somethin, some1 will get hurt.. Ur always think this way, but do u guys watch ur mouths to0? Yes, hurt n rejection. It deprives ourselves from being vocal.. I dun care, i've already made this decision.. and i dun feel likE changin it.. Sometimes i think, I am tryin to pr0ve something that each of us have a different mindset on. Eg. I didn't wanna say my problems de... ur made me, i never even recall sc0ldin u guys and tt's wat pat t0ld mE, say i was unreasonable, i sc0lded them... mayb i did in a fit of anger, but i never wanted to say anything, so dun keep askin me to tell u guys stuff i dun wish to say, cos then later ppl will tell me that u guys r stressed out, tolerating my nuisance wat so eva... And for pete's sake, do ur really think ppl always give in t0 mE? no. they dun. get this clear in ur head. I work hard to get wat i want, others dun, they count on idiots like me to help them get somethin, then every1 will b happy.. Ppl always say, have u thought of others feelings when u say somethin, then i ask u hav u ppl thought of the things bef0re u tell others?? Dun come n say others first, try to change urself, it's u wh0 present this attitude that u wan to b treated this way.. I dunno i jus really need someone wh0 can understand me rite nw... someone i can talk to, can intrepret wat i'm trying to mean, not the other way r0und... haix.. me n pat can say our relationship ok le... but then i guess he will nv like me as muCh... n i dun blame him, life's like this, accept it.Quite touching la... the things he said to me on Sun nitE, i was like so deeply moved, i cried in front of this stupid computer... I guess we will last bah... not f0rever... but for this period of time where many changes occurs... I won't say we will last till eternity... but i really appreciate that i have him n0w.. He will always b a part of the bitter sweet mem0ries i hav in my gr0win years, cos he was the onE wh0 really br0ught me int0 thinkiN, and caused mE 2 changE f0r the bettEr... Seriously, I am not sure whether I am doing the right thing now or not, I decide to take the path as quiet, simple and n0t as complicated as before.. Maybe then I would really find true happiness? Some stuff are really worth trying, cos u'll nv know the greatest outcome would be when u take a risk.. That's wat i'll b doing, risking my life, pat n i's relationship and L6's friendship.. I am going to be straightforward le.. no point hiding behind.. But my mouth will still be shut =) xcept when i smilE! =D lolxXx.. hmm... i guess my mum recieved the "hate" mail i sent her, she caused so much destruction and unrest in my life this year... Many problems resulted from her... sorRy guys... it's all my fault... my bad... haix... dunno wat to say lE... go0d nitE every1... -l0vealLofya-

blastin' *Fleetwo0d Mac - Songbird

Sonbird's Lyrics
For you, there'll be no more crying,
For you, the sun will be shining,
And I feel that when I'm with you,
It's alright, I know it's right
To you, I'll give the world
to you, I'll never be cold
'Cause I feel that when I'm with you,
It's alright, I know it's right.
And the songbirds are singing,
Like they know the score,
And I love you, I love you, I love you,
Like never before.
And I wish you all the love in the world,
But most of all, I wish it from myself.
And the songbirds keep singing,
Like they know the score,
And I love you, I love you, I love you,
Like never before, like never before.